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Goner Message Board / Food & Drink / Low Class Chatter
Posted: Feb 5, 2006 9:50 am
You guys- totally check this out! Follow the fun, the scandal, and the wit at www.portlandfoodanddrink.com

Classic Chatter
Food Dude February 4, 2006 @ 3:55 pm
This post contains some adult language so steer away if you are sensitive. You will probably get a laugh if you continue.

Someone once told me I would be a success, when people started saying things about me behind my back. Keeping that in mind, I always keep an eye on the various food server chatgroups around town. The gossip in general is so vicious and crude, it sounds more like it is coming from high-school kids, than adults. To wit:

Joe (aka Joe Dixon) - Posted: Jan 15, 2006 Will “foodies” in Portland ever get their shit together? That little hissy-fit on PortlandFood.org is embarassing.

fierydrunk (aka tha-krza) - Posted: Feb 3, 2006 “Dining in restaurants is elective, therefore, the chef doesn’t need to bend to a diner’s whim… THANK YOU. I am presently getting beaten up by the moderator of this goofball site. I knew I should have never gone back in there! He hate me. He is claiming that if a restaurant wants to “survive” it needs to cater to vegetarians, esp. in Portland….”

fierydrunk - Posted: Feb 3, 2006 “You could tell in this review that the guy went out to a meat place–just from a few things he said I am venturing that it is even a “Southern” focused menu. You can’t be serious that you would take a vegetarian friend to a place that touts itself as Southern and then complain all over the place about it only having one veggie themed entree.”

fierydrunk - Posted: Feb 3, 2006 - “No, you know what, basically I’m saying “FIERY WHY THE HELL ARE YOU ARGUING WITH THIS GUY??” Oh, cos he is a total asshole and it is fun. Joe Dixon and I have been known to stir things up with the foodies over there… ”

Joe Posted: Feb 3, 2006 - I got yr back over there, fiery. That guy’s such an asshole. I think people in Portland, especially those that have lived in bigger cities, tend to give their palates too much credit. Everyone who knows ANYTHING about food in this town thinks that they’ve got a handle of the complexities of every single cuisine that exists. So fucking obnoxious.

And, yeah, fuck your “diet restrictions”. I’m all for people eating how they want, but the expectation that they’ll be treated differently (extra-specially) for their self-imposed limitations is a ridiculous notion. Go to Veganopolis or the Paradox or the Farm or Vita or ANY OF THE OTHER TEN MILLION veggie-friendly places in this city!”

Fierydrunk - Posted: Feb 3, 2006 - “Alisa, the guy I am arguing with will argue with me over ANYTHING. They are like this gay ass foodie blog and as my girl Heidi Klum of Project Runway says, “Either you in o’ you out.” I’m out. Way out.” …Joe, your comment was priceless. I was going to go in there & comment again but I don’t wanna get us banned…yet.” “…He has so many protectors! When he first started the site, he could take a joke. I mean, he wasn’t funny, but he didn’t chafe at a contrary opinion. Now, if you don’t just totally blow smoke up his ass, you’re getting lambasted by him and his crew of self-important food critic cronies.”

Joe - Posted: Feb 3, 2006 - “Man, it’s been pretty quiet over there for awhile.
Maybe they all drank some of Food Dude’s Kool-Aid.”

fierydrunk -Posted: Feb 4, 2006 - I am officially about to burn the book of one of the bitches in the food blog who must have a crush on the moderator and continues to try to pick more fights with me (I guess fair is fair). Her name is Nancy Rommelman (sp?) and she moved her last year from LA to open yet another coffee roastery with her husband (yeah, we really need another of those). She quickly inserted herself as a Food Critic and I think got her ass fired from Willamette Week. She is a total blowhard who brags how she has been published in Gourmet, LA Weekly etc. Her book is some useless stocking stuffer called Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Food (but were afraid to ask). My dad got it for me. Meet some matches.”

Joe - Posted: Feb 4, 2006 - “Do it! Do it!”

fierydrunk - Posted: Feb 4, 2006 - “I should go do it in front of her husband’s roastery. But then she would likely get me arrested for some sort of hate crime. She defends that “Food Dude” (retch) with a pretty embarrassing passion. I should go get an americano at their place and pull out a stopwatch on the barista. Even if cup is perfect, I’ll send it back.” “…Ms. Nancy Rommelmann’s blog: http://nancyrommelmann.typepad.com/nancy_rommelmann/2005/09/why_portla nd_is.html. Ha! Totally. It should read: “Hi, I’m Nancy Rommelmann and I married the first and only guy who ever asked me. He hated LA and wanted to move to Portland so we could buy a house and he could start probably the most unneccessary business in Portland ever, a coffee roastery. I sort of fancy myself an LA version of ‘Carrie Bradshaw’, if you will, but am more than willing to put up with dirty hippie Portland because people are so kind here compared to LA. And because I’d have to get a divorce to leave.”

Joe Posted: Feb 4, 2006 - “I love self-important hacks who move here from L.A.” “So- I just posted a comment in you defense: “I think, tha-krza, that when you said,

“Nowhere, and I mean nowhere, in my posts did I say the waits and the terrible service were the restaurant’s perogative. That experience, AGAIN in case it has been overlooked, was really obvious bad bad bad service.”

you weren’t clear enough. I mean, I’ve had to quote you TWICE! Which means the above statement- posted originally by you, tha-krza- has now appeared THREE times within this thread. But it’s totally not clear what you mean.

Man, sometimes I feel like maybe these Big City Transplants have got some left-over smog trapped in their brains.”

And when I hit ’submit’ I noticed that at the top of my comment it says “Your comment is awaiting moderation”! WTF?! It’s never done that before! He’s on to us!” < >

Joe Posted: Feb 4, 2006 - “What’s so strange is their sense of importance. Food Dude’s only been publishing for a year, little ol’ Nan JUST moved here to open a vanity business…

Yet they rep like they’ve been “on the scene” for decades. Now, I’m only 25, but I’ve been working in Portland restaurants since I was 17- that’s 8 years… not a lifetime, but I ain’t no rookie.

They refuse to acknowledge anyone but their stuffy, insular, catty group of what seem to be terribly-unhappy-with-their-station-in-life yuppies and silver-spoon-fed (pun NOT intended) wealthy, layabout know-it-alls.

Where does it say that because you’re from LA or SF or NY that you’ve automatically got a leg up on everyone else. So strange, that life-with-blinders-on must be. ”

fierydrunk -Posted: Feb 4, 2006 - “Oh and he did that to me once and I don’t think it was ever published. I read some of her comments on Portland and though I often mock this place, an LA-ite has nooooooooo right. She hasn’t even lived here a year. It is mostly people like her and her dillitante husband who have jacked the housing market up her so ridiculously high that we could never afford to buy a home, much less start a vanity coffee roastery. Remember Joe, these people hit you where it hurt on that thread–talkin’ about YOUR DAD! For shame.”

The last few paragraphs are priceless. I think they are successfully impugning Jim Dixon’s reputation all by themselves. I thought you’d all enjoy these exchanges. Whether you agree or disagree, they are fun to read, and a good argument for staying in college and getting an education. Not all the conversations are this insipid; many of the posters are pretty darn intelligent. You can read all of them over at: Goner Records I’ll add this to my links page.

PS - The poster graphic of trash talk is stolen from a Mormon website. I couldn’t resist.

Filed under: Political Stuff


Joe Dixon:
February 4th, 2006 @ 4:07 pm
But, hey, FD!

I bet you never thought a buncha garage-rockers from around the world would be checking out your site. So that’s cool, right?

And, yeah, I guess we got us some filthy mouths. But that’s just how us uneducated folks like to blow off steam! (Notice all that improper syntax!) I mean, I know I've never seen the word “fuck” on Ms. Rommelmann’s blog…

Bottom line, though: we obviously enjoy your site enough to get so bent outta shape by some of what you publish, come back for more, and direct a whole slew of “pretty darn intelligent” new readers your way. It wouldn’t be Portland if we didn’t.


February 4th, 2006 @ 4:36 pm
Wow! You really found us out!

Where is the emoticon for “tou-frickin’-che”!!!

Excuse me, while I clock back into college.


February 4th, 2006 @ 4:50 pm
This is awesomely hilarious. I await the “you think I’m funny?? Do I amuse you??” part and the shaking in the alley behind the restaurant later.


February 4th, 2006 @ 4:52 pm
Gosh, “shaking” should be “shanking.” Though for “gay ass foodies” maybe it’s correct. Hmmm…


Jack Stands:
February 4th, 2006 @ 5:06 pm
Can anyone here give me some insight on chewing? I’m really confused; I’ve heard 25 times per bite, but also 33. Seriously. This keeps me up at night….


February 4th, 2006 @ 5:09 pm
Mr. Dixon should clean his reading glasses:
http://nancyrommelmann.typepad.com/nancy_rommelmann/2006/01/beyond_the _offi.html


February 4th, 2006 @ 6:37 pm
As psychiatrist Frank Pittman said, “The swapping of insults, like the fighting between brothers, becomes the seal of the male bonding.”

Posted: Feb 5, 2006 9:53 am
February 4th, 2006 @ 6:37 pm
As psychiatrist Frank Pittman said, “The swapping of insults, like the fighting between brothers, becomes the seal of the male bonding.”

Critical posters, methinks you doth protest too much.
Makes me wonder who the real “gay ass foodie” is!

They must be disguising their real fondness for you.
Perhas this be the home of Brokeback (Soda) Fountain soon!

All this is quite a compliment Food Dude! The fact that they dwell on you so much indicates that you’re so often on the mark it bothers the Hell out of them.

They sure seem to have a fixation on your little web site.

Well done!


February 4th, 2006 @ 6:43 pm
oh…I dunno….as a Portland senior citizen who eats out a lot and appreciates good food and service, I really enjoy reading EPFD. And any comments connected with it.


Dave J.:
February 4th, 2006 @ 7:27 pm
There’s enough insecurity in those quoted posts to power a small city of therapists for a good decade or so.

Well done, FD.


Jack Stands:
February 4th, 2006 @ 8:21 pm
Mastication is important, people. I am worried. Help.


Jack Stands:
February 4th, 2006 @ 8:27 pm
In fact, one time, some guys and I were at my mom’s house playing Advanced Dungeons and Dragons, listening to some Yes for effect (lemme tell you, Heart of the Sunrise sets it OFF!), and Jeb made a taco run. There was crispy and some soft tacos mixed in. Well, I hate to say it, but I’m pretty sure one of my bites on the crisp tortilla was less than 17 chews. I got sick a few weeks later….


February 4th, 2006 @ 9:58 pm
The simplified version:

Fiery: That FoodDude guy is an asshole.
Joe: Yeah, totally.
Fiery: Totally yeah.
Joe: Totally fucking yeah.
Fiery: Really totally fucking yeah.
Joe: Really, really totally fucking yeah.
Fiery: OK, let’s get some more beer.
Joe: Yeah. I’ll ask my dad for some money.
Fiery: Kewl!

Chomp, chomp.



February 4th, 2006 @ 10:44 pm
That is funny. I didn’t know FD was a P.I…. This site is such great entertainment.


Marshall Manning:
February 5th, 2006 @ 12:11 am
MCZ, couldn’t those Coronas use a bit more salt?


Joe Dixon:
February 5th, 2006 @ 1:33 am
Posted: Feb 5, 2006 1:22 pm
like, totally fucking gay ass, man.
Posted: Feb 5, 2006 1:40 pm
"Not all the conversations are this insipid; many of the posters are pretty darn intelligent."

He's gotta be talking about Jack.

Thanks for posting, Joe. If ever there was proof in the pudding, this is it!
Posted: Feb 5, 2006 6:19 pm
As stated, the guy is a CREEP. He really should be more careful with some of what he is doing!

I'm hungry. Kewl!
Posted: Feb 5, 2006 6:23 pm

I'll ask my Dad for some money!
Posted: Feb 5, 2006 6:32 pm

That is lice shampoo.
Posted: Feb 5, 2006 6:36 pm
Whatever... leave me alone! I'm not hip to this newfangled lingo the kids are groovin' on these days.
Posted: Feb 6, 2006 12:35 am
uh, WTF guys?
Posted: Feb 6, 2006 1:26 am
Fuhgeduhboutit. Or however you say it. Waste of time.
Posted: Feb 6, 2006 4:08 pm | Edited by: The Troll

# bigfoot:
February 5th, 2006 @ 10:44 am

I’m suprised nobody has pointed this out, but reading the “conversation” between Joe and “Fiery drunk” seems an awful lot like watching a rerun of Beavis and Butthead. It’s funny for a few minutes, but then it goes on waaaay to long. I’ve taken to tuning them out, why waste “my beautiful brain” (if you don’t recognize the quote, google it) obsessing over two writers who seem to enjoy mocking everybody other than their own greek chorus? I would suggest that if they do “return to college,” they take psych 101 and learn a bit about projection, before spending any more time “decoding” every other writer’s motives.

PS- Maybe it’s just me, but the “gay ass foodie” and “brokeback fountain” references in the original post seem pretty homophobic.
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