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Goner Message Board / ???? / Rock Bottom
Posted: Apr 4, 2005 11:08 pm | Edited by: Womb Raider
 
I recently saw the video for Van Halen's "Right Now" on VH1 Classic. I think this video pretty much captures the exact point in time where rock 'n roll was at its absolute worst, completely bottomed out. It is also possibly the worst music video ever made. If anyone cares to remember, this was also the "theme song" for the Crystal Pepsi ad campaign. Truly one of the darker moments in rock 'n roll.
Posted: Apr 4, 2005 11:32 pm
 
that video is hilarious.

someone is walking on a nude beach.....for the first time.
Posted: Apr 4, 2005 11:34 pm
 
Someone is calling a plumber to unclog their shower b/c they jacked in there one too many times...for the 3rd time.
Posted: Apr 4, 2005 11:35 pm
 
when ya get old,and run out of ideas,I guess you pretty much have to do what the record producer tells you to do.I've never met mr. hagar, but I bet his desire to make more money outrides his creativity.Especially If he's got a motherfucker of a contract to crank out even more garbage.I want to try out that tequila he makes, or then again maybe not.
Posted: Apr 4, 2005 11:54 pm
 
Van Hagar was part of the end...
That and Def Lepard's drummer's attempt to go at it single handedly...
Enuff Z' Nuff...
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 12:17 am
 
this was Van Hagar's attempt to be intellectual and socially conscious....
....
....
why?
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 12:29 am
 
I agree with Chris on his theory that this video may encapsulate the worst time period of rocknroll history, BUT.......they made a shit load of money off that song, and continue to reap the benefits of royalties whilst we sit around on a garage rock message board. My's well jump?
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 12:31 am
 
Wait why did Wang Chung just THINK MY EXACT THOUGHTS??!! Ok this Japanese man really is very strange!
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 12:33 am
 
What happenned to the broken English Wang? OMFG! Me thinks Singles & Wang perhaps same personing!
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 12:34 am
 
derp....
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 2:41 am
 
The plot thickens.
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 5:00 am
 
Actually..on the issue of jackin' in the shower...

friend of mine knows a guy who swears that a buddy of his worked for the city cleaning the water disposal lines from shower drainage. Supposedly, the would start to clog from semen build-up in the drain pipes. Yes, dudes jackin' in the shower can fuck shit up. Allegedly...
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 8:58 am
 
I highly doubt that...I don't think a collection of jizz could reach that magnitude without washing away.

Jacking off in the shower sucks anyway.
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 2:27 pm
 
Yes it does. It's much more enjoyable on the front porch.
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 2:32 pm
 
Right Now your gentlemen callers are slipping on the puddles of man goo you've so cavilierly left on the front porch.
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 2:55 pm
 
If anyone cares to remember, ["Right Now"] was also the "theme song" for the Crystal Pepsi ad campaign. Truly one of the darker moments in rock 'n roll.

Just as Crystal Pepsi was one of the darker moments in the Cola Wars, ironically enough.
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 2:59 pm
 
or was it one of the "clearer moments?"

hmmmm.

I like diet pepsi vanilla.
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 3:11 pm
 
did they use "Right Now" in the Crystal Clear Gravy commercial on SNL too?
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 3:49 pm | Edited by: dan gerous
 
"it's got what it takes...so tell me why can't this be love? straight from the heeeart! oh baby why can't this be love! "

Hagar is the fucking worst. Probably the most annoying vocalist in rock'n'roll history.
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 3:55 pm
 
Sammy Hagar's Cabo Wabo tequila is $100 a bottle.

It tastes great with Crystal Pepsi.
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 3:57 pm
 
Right Now Crystal Pepsi is $100 a bottle on Ebay.
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 4:04 pm
 
Together, you would have the worst, most expensive drink available.
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 4:18 pm
 
Sammy Hagar's Cabo Wabo tequila is $100 a bottle.

It tastes great with Crystal Pepsi.
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 4:53 pm | Edited by: Womb Raider
 
I forgot that the album with "Right Now" on it is called For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge... god, Hagar is a fucking douche.
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 4:59 pm
 
Right Now Sammy Hagar is watching Judge Judy on daytime television and thinking about getting up off the couch, shaving and going outside to find a job.
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 5:08 pm
 
No Sam, that would be me.
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 5:09 pm
 
you're not thinking about shaving.
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 5:16 pm
 
someone is actually selling a peter gabriel 'Mindblender' "letterman" style crystal pepsi jacket on ebay

< a href="http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=20187&item=7127396354&rd=1&ssPageName=W D1V">http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=20187&item=7127396354&rd=1&ssPageName=WD 1V</a>
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 5:17 pm
 
figure it out yourself. "ROCK&ROL CRYSTAL PEPSI LEATHER JACKET letterman style" The last L is left off for savings.
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 5:22 pm
 
Gary is thinking about shaving his bikini area.

Right Now Matt is probably sitting at home crippled and bored. Apparently somebody shot at him last night in front of his house. In the fracas, he dropped his celly and so when I talked to him, I couldn't get the whole story.

Also, K&I and a dog walking buddy of ours found an honest-to-Jah voodoo doll on the ground while walking our pooches last night. Pretty weird. We didn't touch it.
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 8:38 pm
 
That Van Halen song/video (and perhaps the band au general) is one of the great proofs positive that there was no such thing as rock n' roll anymore even by the eighties, except in tiny bars played by people who will never be rich or famous. So goes the show I guess.
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 8:45 pm | Edited by: Womb Raider
 
Yeah, but there was nothing good going on in 1991 when that song came out, except maybe in seattle. very few good underground bands and nothing even resembling good popular music. smells like teen spirit had yet to be released.. who was popular then? Firehouse, L.A. Guns.... fuck.
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 9:09 pm
 
Mr. Big
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 9:31 pm
 
Mr. Bungle
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 11:44 pm
 
Mr. Mister
Posted: Apr 5, 2005 11:50 pm
 
You said L.A. Guns.... heh.
I think there was a hairband from Jersey around that time called Sweet F.A.; The sticker on the album had some promo shit, like, "Think five partyin' dudes from Hoboken know how to rock? You bet your Sweet F.A.!"
I hope they shot each other.
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