Posted: Jun 10, 2013 3:38 pm |
Edited by: tigerblinds
He used to creep me out. He could remember weird things I posted on here over 15 (?) years ago...that always creeps me out, because I say stupid distorted half-truth shit all of the time. I've mellowed but it's always weird when someone throws that shit back in my face.
I met this girl last time I was in Nashville, I had been texting her regularly, then finaly she started throwing these facts about my life back at me, shit I never told her...like being at the first Nine Pound Hammer reunion at Sleazefest 2001 (?) or my record label and a bunch of crazy shit she must have read on this messageboard. Since I don't realy do anything, that's kind of flattering...on the other hand it's creepy as hell. She quit responding to my texts after that...I never told her I was creeped out, I was just like what gives?
That reminds me of this other creepy incident where this "label" guy in Nashville emailed me and told me to read his blog where he talks about how he took over the record pressing plant I used, and how the records are pretty good if you get them for free off the floor like he did. I never responded back to that one, because it was just like what a fucking creep. The after a few months of trying to get my masters and being hung up on I just said fuck it.
I'm actually a year older than this guy and met him when we were teenagers....I thought he was a creep then, who was part of that MakeUp Shellac, white belt crowd...and it was kind of refreshing to know that once a douchebag always a douchebag, not matter how much critical acclaim you receive.
Basically against those odds I don't realy give a shit....I'm glad Nanne was such a talented guy and I'm sure he deserved more recognition like so many others. I never wished any harm to him...I'm not gonna lie that he bugged the hell out of me and creeped me out alot.
As I've gotten older, I've learned that alot of people struggle with the same insecurities that I coped with growing up...they could be in their 40s and 50s, who knows, everyone has their own cross to bare. But the only way we even have a chance to be friends or have any sort of positive relationship is if I try to be secure in myself and not over react to their attitudes. I wish Nanne and I had gotten along better on here, I didn't know how bad the poor guy suffered, but even at the time it was kind of apparent. I have been a legit asshole/shithead many times in my life, I'm not going to try to deny it...I have misrepresented myself at times and my true beliefs...I have told white lies to get snooping, snooty people into rediculous shit or simply off my ass...but there should almost be like a sliding scale for assholeness, and I feel like my conscious is clean when it comes to Nanne. We were both crotchety old school record dorks in a world where our dreams were mostly impossible. I realy wish we could have been friends. I don't have any finite goals, he always seemed have something he was shooting for.