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Goner Message Board / ???? / joke time
Posted: Mar 27, 2013 1:21 pm
why did the frog die?
he Kermit suicide

why was 6 scared of 7?
cause 7 was a 6 offender

a horse walks into a bar.
the bartender says "Why the long face?"
the horse replies "I have cancer"
Posted: Mar 27, 2013 2:50 pm
A boy walks in on his Dad fucking his Mom. Instead of stopping the Dad, about to bust a nut, turns around and says, "HAHA! Yeah! Howya like me now!"

A couple days later the Dad walks in on the boy fucking his grandmother. Instead of stopping the boy turns and says, "Haha! Yeah! How's it feel when it's your Mom!"
Posted: Mar 27, 2013 4:18 pm
Me: I know a good joke about Belgians.
The dude: I AM Belgian!
Me: I will tell it to you slowly then.
Posted: Apr 3, 2013 7:56 pm
whattaya call a teacher with gas?
a: a tooter.
Posted: Apr 3, 2013 9:28 pm
Man to lady: What's the difference between a Ferrari and a hard-on?

Lady: No idea.

Man: I DON'T have a Ferrari right now.
Posted: Apr 4, 2013 6:37 am
Spanish Joke:
How do you know the airplane above is portugese?
It has hair under its wings
Posted: Apr 4, 2013 10:20 am
That reminds me:

Two second grade boys peeing at the urinal together. One says to the other, "Hey why is your penis so big? Is it because you're Portuguese?". The other kid says, "No, it's because I'm eighteen.".
Posted: Apr 4, 2013 1:25 pm
I like my women like I like my doctor's hands. Sterile.
Posted: Apr 8, 2013 12:07 pm | Edited by: tigerblinds
Old man is on his death bed. He calls his grandson in and says, "I have something very nice to give you." Grandson says, "what is it? Your rolex watch?" Old man says, "No it's my chrome plated forty-five." Grandson says, "but I'd rather have your rolex." To which he responds, "Grandson, one day you will be a successfull business man and you might come home to find another man in bed with your wife. What will you do then? Point to your watch and say time to go?"
Posted: Apr 8, 2013 9:40 pm
did ya hear about Carson Dalys new condiment line? on the box it reads "please store in an un-cool area".
Posted: Apr 9, 2013 1:23 pm
I've been trying some of these jokes out at work today. The relatively classy 45 vs Rolex joke bombs, but the boy banging his grandmother is a smash. The stereotypes are true.
Posted: Apr 9, 2013 2:24 pm
relatively classy 45 vs Rolex joke bombs

Well if it's any consolation that one was told to me by a vietnam vet.

Did you hear the one about the son who saw his Dad fucking a goat?
They asked him if it bothered him and he said, "naaaahhhh" (like a goat)
Posted: Apr 9, 2013 8:27 pm
How many southerners does it take to change a light bulb?

Three, one to change it and two to talk about how much better the old bulb was.
Posted: Apr 11, 2013 1:11 am
whats the difference between 3 dicks and a joke?

your mom cant take a joke
Posted: Apr 11, 2013 1:24 am
dog walks into a bar, bartender says "how was your day?" dog replies "rough".
Posted: Apr 11, 2013 4:55 am
man driving in car sees police flashing lights in mirror and pulls up.
Officer Cole says: "did you realise your wife fell out the car 2 miles back"
He replies "Thank fuck for that. i thought i'd went deaf"
Posted: Sep 1, 2013 12:50 pm
What do you get when you suck on a gentile lady's tits?

Goy milk.
Posted: Sep 1, 2013 10:46 pm
What kind of music does a homosexual Rastafarian listen to?
way gay
Posted: Sep 2, 2013 6:15 am
What do you call a mechanically inclined gay?

Handy dandy.

What's the state bird of Wyoming?

The Peckerwood.
Posted: Sep 3, 2013 11:52 am
Giraffe walks into a bar, sez "the high balls are on me".
Posted: Sep 3, 2013 2:28 pm
why is a small pair of pants like a small hotel?

no ball room!
Posted: Sep 3, 2013 3:14 pm
What's the worst part about being a dick?

Your neighbors are two nuts and an asshole.
Posted: Sep 3, 2013 3:32 pm
What did the banana say to the vibrator?

"What are YOU shaking for? She's going to eat me!"
Posted: Sep 4, 2013 5:21 pm
how do you know when your girlfriend is getting fat?

when she starts to fit into your wifes clothes.
Posted: Sep 4, 2013 5:23 pm
or... i like my women how i like my whiskey. aged 15 years and sprinkled with coke.
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