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Goner Message Board / ???? / Jesus fixed my windshield!
Posted: Jul 28, 2010 11:03 pm
 
JESUS MEDINA
Mobile Technician

JESUS, a mobile technician with our company, will be arriving at your requested location to meet your auto glass needs. JESUS has successfully completed our extensive certification program and has passed all given motor vehicle, drug and background screenings. You can trust JESUS to install your auto glass in a courteous and professional manner.
Posted: Aug 1, 2010 8:25 pm
 
The online Dominos pizza tracker told me Jesus was delivering my pizza to me. Got a screen shot somewhere.
Didnt look like the Jesus to me!!!
Posted: Aug 1, 2010 8:28 pm
 
how do you know what the Jesus looked like???
Posted: Aug 1, 2010 8:30 pm
 
he's a black woman
Posted: Aug 1, 2010 10:48 pm
 
how do you know what the Jesus looked like???
google image search, duh.
Posted: Aug 1, 2010 10:53 pm
 
I didn't realize I said "the Jesus"
But you know which one I'm talking about
Posted: Aug 1, 2010 10:53 pm
 
you were looking for this
one?
Posted: Aug 1, 2010 10:57 pm
 
Jesus was not white. He was an arabic jew, probably about 5' tall with short hair and dark skin. remember, judas had to indicate to the soldiers which one was Jesus, which proves that he did not have features remarkably different from those of his arabic jewish followers.
Posted: Aug 1, 2010 10:58 pm | Edited by: bradx
 
...
Posted: Aug 1, 2010 11:08 pm
 
you were looking for this
one?

didn't i just say that
Posted: Aug 2, 2010 9:03 am
 
Jesus was not white. He was an arabic jew, probably about 5' tall with short hair and dark skin. remember, judas had to indicate to the soldiers which one was Jesus, which proves that he did not have features remarkably different from those of his arabic jewish followers.

So you're saying this isn't an accurate portrayal?

http://gawker.com/5518530/christians-super-pissed-about-possible-jesus -penis

Fuck I can't find anything in comon with Jesus that stupid bastard.
Posted: Aug 2, 2010 12:30 pm
 
Who dis Jesus guy?
Is dere a book bout him or what?
Posted: Aug 2, 2010 12:44 pm
 
Jesus fixed my windshield!
Jesus was delivering my pizza to me

I smell an imposter
Posted: Aug 6, 2010 9:05 am
 
Jesus was not white. He was an arabic jew, probably about 5' tall with short hair and dark skin. remember, judas had to indicate to the soldiers which one was Jesus, which proves that he did not have features remarkably different from those of his arabic jewish followers.

As it says in the bible:

"And as the soldiers entered the temple, Judas motioned to Jesus that he needeth the John, to which Jesus sayeth 'Go, Judas. And do not forget to washeth thine hands'. And the multitude did rejoice in merriment at Jesu's joke. And Judas, as he walketh past the soldiers, whispered sharply to them 'He's the tall white guy having a good old laugh over there'. With that the soldiers did arresteth Our Lord"
Posted: Aug 6, 2010 10:56 am
 
Donkeys Can Talk, People Can Fly, And A Man Named Jesus Lives Up In The Sky!
http://www.landoverbaptist.org/christianreader.html
Posted: Aug 6, 2010 11:53 am
 
we're all evolved from dragonflies
Posted: Aug 7, 2010 1:31 am
 
I like this one!
Posted: Aug 7, 2010 1:32 am
 
Wow! That was totally the wrong link, but I may like that one even better!
Posted: Aug 7, 2010 1:33 am
 
This is the one I was trying to link to.
Posted: Aug 7, 2010 10:12 am | Edited by: m t millionaire
 
HEE-HAW!!!
Posted: Aug 7, 2010 10:14 am
 
it appears that the heehaw thing is broken.
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