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Goner Message Board / ???? / Eating Pussy
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 1:15 am
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 1:37 am
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 1:39 am

Until you get the human papaloma virus and shit. But to quote a poet who is more sane than I am.

"It's that smell that gets me high!"
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 1:42 am
get high on the smell
catch a buzz on the juice
just dive that muff
its worth a deuce
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 1:49 am
I think I have a pubic hair stuck in my throat.
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 2:58 am
taste like kitty cats.
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 5:27 am
Sit on my face!
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 5:59 am

(sorry mom,
but it's true)
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 8:37 am
Part the lips and lick the ridge, get some ketchup from the fridge
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 12:52 pm

Posted: Dec 3, 2008 2:34 pm
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 2:35 pm
I thought this was gonna be about the Rudy Ray Moore Christmas album...
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 3:52 pm
Y'all niggas don't know a damn thing about eating pussy!
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 7:56 pm | Edited by: chuckvicious
There was a girl that I was eating out in the parking lot next to the Ck's on highland. This was a really cute Nu metal chick that thought that I liked White Zombie. You see, after I threw a pudding wrestling contest a long time ago, for a fund raiser for the Ronald McDonald House, a red nek chick who worked at the former Cloud 9 hair studio, wanted to give me a free cut, because she thought I was cute. I told her to have fun and do something unusual. It consisted of braiding my hair into different sections and dying each one a different shade of red blue or green. So, one time when I was hanging out at Niels singing Karaoke with this Koren girl(that I fucked after she made me some really nice Kim Che) This girl noticed me while I was singing "way down yonder in the Chatahooche" I hung out with her a few times, because she was good at BJ's. Anyway, after I had finished her off in the back of her dads truck(that had a plastic truck bed cover on so no one could see us) I noticed a Cop car had blocked us in. I strolled over to the front of Ck's and saw that those cops were picking up some coffee. I knocked on the window, they came out, and I said "Hey, Move! your blocking me in" They were illegally parked and apologized to me then moved immediately. This made me look bad ass in front of the Nu metal chick who was already happy with me( because I am very good at eating pussy)
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 8:05 pm
I used to fuck this girl. One night we were in my car in a park and I was rubbing her pussy and I was about to pull my dick out, when a fucking squad car pulled up behind us! It was -17 below out and the fucking cops got me out of the car and were asking me what was going on and I was like we're just having a little spat, nothing big. They told us to beat it 'cuz nobody is supposed to be in the park after sundown, etc. I was lucky I didn't get a DUI 'cuz I was fucked up. After that we went back to my parent's house and I was eating her pussy when all of a sudden I started getting the spins and wound up puking!
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 8:46 pm
ya think pioneers ate pussy back in dem days??? in the back of a chuckwagon???
Posted: Dec 3, 2008 11:47 pm
i think thats what they called it back then
Posted: Dec 4, 2008 3:34 am
"He was a bold man that first ate an oyster" Jonathan Swift
Posted: Dec 4, 2008 4:31 am
Crappin on ho's.
And now pukin on pussy.

I wonder if Grampa Riggler has some good ol story to teach us kids a lesson, cause this can't be right.
Posted: Dec 4, 2008 6:39 am

I wonder if Grampa Riggler has some good ol story to teach us kids a lesson, cause this can't be right.

Seven wise men with knowledge so fine,
created a pussy to their design.
First was a butcher,
with smart wit,
using a knife,
he gave it a slit,
Second was a carpenter,
strong and bold,
with a hammer and chisel,
he gave it a hole,
Third was a tailor,
tall and thin,
by using red velvet,
he lined it within,
Fourth was a hunter,
short and stout,
with a piece of fox fur,
he lined it without,
Fifth was a fisherman,
nasty as hell,
threw in a fish and gave it a smell,
Sixth was a preacher,
whose name was McGee,
he touched it and blessed it,
and said it could pee,
Last was a sailor,
dirty little runt,
he sucked it and fucked it,
and called it a cunt.
Posted: Dec 4, 2008 8:32 am
Are these the same men who build Harry a pussy?
Posted: Dec 4, 2008 10:40 am
This one time when I was less experienced I had this girlfriend and I was going down on her and it was taking too long and I was getting bored so I started writing out letters of the alphabet with my tongue and after going through the ABCs a few times I started writing things like "this is boring" and "hurry up and get off" and shit like that and then she totally called me out on it asked if I was spelling stuff and I had to deny it up and down and act like that was the most ridiculous thing I ever heard of and after that I learned my lesson that if you're not into it, it's probably gonna take even longer, which will make you even less into it and it will become a vicious circle of cunnilingus non-enjoyment which is not fun for anybody.
Posted: Dec 4, 2008 10:47 am
For all of you poor bastards that need help & are too embarressed to ask,
you should listen to Juliana Luecking's 'Dream Cum Go Down'
it's full of real advice & very hot to listen to as well.
http://www.killrockstars.com/bands/julianaluecking/press/excerpt234.ht ml
[i][if you're not into it, it's probably gonna take even longer, which will make you even less into it and it will become a vicious circle of cunnilingus non-enjoyment which is not fun for anybody.
Posted: Dec 8, 2008 9:45 pm
Posted: Dec 8, 2008 10:40 pm
Don't forget the Miller's Tale from Mr. Chaucer..

And through the window she put out her hole.
And Absalom no better felt nor worse,
But with his mouth he kissed her naked arse
Right greedily, before he knew of this.
Aback he leapt- it seemed somehow amiss,
For well he knew a woman has no beard;
He'd felt a thing all rough and longish haired,
And said, "Oh fie, alas! What did I do?"
"Teehee!" she laughed, and clapped the, window to;
And Absalom went forth a sorry pace.
"A beard! A beard!" cried clever Nicholas,
"Now by God's corpus, this goes fair and well!"
This hapless Absalom, he heard that yell,
And on his lip, for anger, he did bite;
And to himself he said, "I will requite!"
Who vigorously rubbed and scrubbed his lips
With dust, with sand, with straw, with cloth, with chips,
But Absalom, and often cried "Alas!
My soul I give now unto Sathanas,
For rather far than own this town," said he,
"For this despite, it's well revenged I'd be.
Alas," said he, "from her I never blenched!"
His hot love was grown cold, aye and all quenched;
Posted: Dec 8, 2008 10:54 pm
I had this girlfriend. She had some issues. She was a really bad drunk. Probably the worst I've ever seen. For sure the worst I've ever dated. I think she was a tad masochistic, 'cuz one night, I was railroading her from behind, and she asked me if I wanted to fuck her in the ass! Yet, she wouldn't let me eat her blaze orange firecrotch!
Posted: Dec 9, 2008 7:23 am
Teacher asked Tim, " Why is your cat at school today?" Tim starts crying and says, " I heard my daddy tell my mom I'm going to eat that pussy when the kids go to school."
Posted: Dec 9, 2008 9:31 am
Wow, that's totally rare! A girl that wants to be fucked in the ass.
Posted: Dec 10, 2008 1:25 am | Edited by: mexicajun
"If God didn't want us to eat pussy he wouldn't have made it look so much like a taco." -Robert Anton Wilson
Posted: Dec 10, 2008 5:25 am
Wow, that's totally rare! A girl that wants to be fucked in the ass.

Too animalistic!
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