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Goner Message Board / ???? / Man charged for farting at cop
Posted: Sep 25, 2008 9:09 am
Sep 24, 9:52 PM EDT

Man charged after allegedly passing gas toward cop

SOUTH CHARLESTON, W.Va. (AP) -- A West Virginia man who police said passed gas and fanned it toward a patrolman has been charged with battery on a police officer.

Jose A. Cruz, 34, of Clarksburg, was pulled over early Tuesday for driving without headlights, police said. According to the criminal complaint, Cruz smelled of alcohol, had slurred speech and failed three field sobriety tests before he was handcuffed and taken to a police station for a breathalyzer test.

As Patrolman T.E. Parsons prepared the machine, Cruz scooted his chair toward Parsons, lifted his leg and "passed gas loudly," the complaint said.

Cruz, according to complaint, then fanned the gas toward the officer.

"The gas was very odorous and created contact of an insulting or provoking nature with Patrolman Parsons," the complaint alleged.

He was also charged with driving under the influence, driving without headlights and two counts of obstruction.

Cruz acknowledged passing gas, but said he didn't move his chair toward the officer nor aim gas at the patrolman. He said he had an upset stomach at the time, but police denied his request to go to the bathroom when he first arrived at the station.

"I couldn't hold it no more," he said.

He also denied being drunk and uncooperative as the police complaint alleged. He added he was upset at being prepared for a breathalyzer test while having an asthma attack. The police statement said he later resisted being secured for a trip to a hospital that he requested for asthma treatment.

Cruz said the officers thought the gas incident was funny when it happened and laughed about it with him.

"This is ridiculous," he said. "I could be facing time."
Posted: Sep 25, 2008 11:37 am
This guy is my hero.

What if he becomes a political prisoner, and people set up benefit concerts to help free him, and Rage Against the Machine writes a song about him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted: Sep 25, 2008 11:39 am
"I couldn't hold it no more," he said.

Posted: Sep 25, 2008 12:23 pm
This guy is my hero.
That's exactly what I was going to say. A true patriot!
I'm going to write a song for this guy and "I couldnt hold it no more" is gonna be the chorus.
Posted: Sep 25, 2008 12:48 pm
i would vote for this person
Posted: Sep 25, 2008 1:31 pm
"hey, buddy. whatta ya in for"?

"farting on a cop"
Posted: Sep 25, 2008 2:13 pm
*prison alpha dog backs the fuck off*
Posted: Sep 25, 2008 2:16 pm
Hey Pez, keep us updated on how the (surely hilarious) trial goes.
Posted: Sep 25, 2008 2:19 pm
I am wearing my West Virginia shirt in this man's honor today.
Posted: Sep 25, 2008 2:33 pm
driving without headlights and two counts of obstruction. ??????
If cars were powered by our farts this would have never happened.
New sticker slogan. "Fart if you hate cops."
Posted: Sep 25, 2008 2:43 pm
hopefully, court tv will be broadcasting trial coverage live.

if the shit doesn't fit, you must acquit.
Posted: Sep 25, 2008 2:44 pm
maybe we'll see the introduction of the "if you smelt it, you dealt it" defense.
Posted: Sep 25, 2008 5:34 pm
maybe we'll see the introduction of the "if you smelt it, you dealt it" defense.
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