Posted: Sep 25, 2007 7:50 pm
most hallowed college programs in history losing to a I-AA school nobody's even heard of. espn even took a poll of how many people knew where app state even
ha ha, check this out from oHIo's fav punk rock band named after somebody better:
In the biggest upset in the history of college sports, the history of Western Civilization and all of the history that is ever to be written unto the end of time The Appalachian State Fightin' Sodomites defeated the Michigan Wolverines by a score of 34-32 to open the 2007 football season.
The barefoot bushwackers of the bucolic backwoods put a primal fear into the Michigan Stadium crowd as they took to the field and dramatically reenacted Pickett's Charge at Gettysburg while their Fightin' Sodomites Marching Band played a down home version of Dead Schembechlers "Bomb Ann Arbord Now." "We uns is the A-State Bomb and weez uh gunna bomb Ann Arbor," drawled App State star Cletus the Slack Jawed Tight End. "Speakin' of tight ends I'z gotta meet muh pappy in the tool shed when I git home," he said with a gap toothed smile. Thousands of cowardly scUM fans fled for the exits before the first whistle even blew.
"I cannot believe we lost to a team from a a part of the world where they still point at airplanes," lamented perennial Michigan laughingstock Lloyd Carr. "The fact that we gave up 34 points to a school where no one can even count up to 34 is not going to sit well with my evil Wolverine masters."
To show their gratitude following the game thousands of OSU students rushed onto High Street to begin collecting funds to assist in bringing indoor plumbing to App State. "We really want to help those poor creatures," chirped perky, large breasted freshmen Sue Bertola. "I suppose we'll have to teach them how to use fire to begin with." Meanwhile in Ann Arbor the App State faithful ran wild thru the streets sodomizing at will while letting loose with rebel yells with reckless abandon.
Geez, how do they feel about that in Boone? ah, they've probably heard it all before