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Goner Message Board / ???? / top 10 most coolest things ever.
Posted: Jun 12, 2007 5:17 pm
 
1. Air Force Jets
2. Hummers
3. Cake (chocolate)
4. Speedboats
5. Honda ATC's
6. UZI 9 millimeetah'
7. Best Buy
8. Irish Spring
9. Paddle Boats
10. Yahoo Serious.
Posted: Jun 12, 2007 5:18 pm
 
2. Hummers

I hope you mean blow jobs.
Posted: Jun 12, 2007 5:21 pm
 
No way is cake cooler than pie. Johan Kugelburg makes a better list than that shit! Standard poodles ain't even on there!
Posted: Jun 12, 2007 5:31 pm
 
Those are an abomination!!!! They're like the ungainly retards of the foo-foo set.

Paddle boats & speedboats do kick ass! My neighbor/landlord has 4 ATVs and vanity plates regarding riding around on said ATVs. He always tries to get me to go muddin'. I wish he had a speedboat.
Posted: Jun 12, 2007 5:34 pm
 
1. Jet Packs
2. Jukebox
3. Hedgehogs
4. Shop Vac
5. Pelicans
6. Tampax "UFO Dictator"
7. Mind Control
8. Burritos
9. Surfing
10. Deep Fryer / Vocoder (*tie)
Posted: Jun 12, 2007 5:39 pm
 
i like erics list betturr.
Posted: Jun 12, 2007 5:48 pm
 
Pelicans is a fine replacement for standard poodles.
Posted: Jun 12, 2007 5:49 pm
 
um, standurrd poodles.
Posted: Jun 12, 2007 6:02 pm
 
10. tiramasu
9. rocky mountain klee kai
8. baddlepoats
7. dwight scrute bobbleheads
6. breakfast bars
5. donating to the MS Society MS150 ride
4. OSTRICHES!
3. grinderman at the fucking metro
2. grinderman at the fucking metro
1. grinderman at the fucking metro
Posted: Jun 12, 2007 6:44 pm
 
Pelicans are huge! They're suddenly all over the place here, I don't think this is their traditional home. I was on a paddle boat (seriously) last summer and came up on a few of 'em and they were giants. One of 'em sold me a burger out of his voluminous beakbill while dribbling a basketball.
Posted: Jun 12, 2007 7:17 pm
 
Very well, sir.
Step this way.
We'll find another game to play.

Bim comes.
Ben comes.
Bim brings Ben broom.
Ben brings Bim broom.

Ben bends Bim's broom.
Bim bends Ben's broom.
Bim's bends.
Ben's bends.
Ben's bent broom breaks.
Bim's bent broom breaks.

Ben's band. Bim's band.
Big bands. Pig bands.

Bim and Ben lead bands with brooms.
Ben's band bangs and Bim's band booms.

Pig band! Boom band!
Big band! Broom band!
My poor mouth can't say that. No, sir.
My poor mouth is much too slow, sir.

Well then... bring your mouth this way.
I'll find it something it can say.
Posted: Jun 12, 2007 7:19 pm
 
Let's have a little talk about tweetle beetles....

What do you know about tweetle beetles? Well...

When tweetle beetles fight,
it's called a tweetle beetle battle.

And when they battle in a puddle,
it's a tweetle beetle puddle battle.

AND when tweetle beetles battle with paddles in a puddle,
they call it a tweetle beetle puddle paddle battle.

AND...

When beetles battle beetles in a puddle paddle battle
and the beetle battle puddle is a puddle in a bottle...
...they call this a tweetle beetle bottle puddle paddle battle muddle.

AND...

When beetles fight these battles in a bottle with their paddles
and the bottle's on a poodle and the poodle's eating noodles...
...they call this a muddle puddle tweetle poodle beetle noodle
bottle paddle battle.
Posted: Jun 12, 2007 8:17 pm
 
I hope you mean blow jobs
yea.. those are cool too.

fergot one.. Those underwater propeler things that scuba divers use.
Posted: Jun 12, 2007 8:23 pm
 
Posted: Jun 12, 2007 8:24 pm | Edited by: alex cuervo
 
1) taxidermy
2) inner-city black kids that talk like film noir private eyes
3) flan
4) the Smothers Brothers
5) time travel
6) gel shoe inserts
7) nitrous oxide
8) koala bears or sloths (tie)
9) Cherry Cavendish pipe tobacco
10) INSANE CLOWN PUSSY
Posted: Jun 12, 2007 8:42 pm
 
2) inner-city black kids that talk like film noir private eyes


have you seen a movie called "Brick?"
Posted: Jun 12, 2007 9:03 pm
 
Yeah. Lucas Haas was awesome in that.
Posted: Jun 12, 2007 9:11 pm
 
10. Van Halen "II"
9. giant 2 LB Steak Florentine
8. Yueng Ling Beer
7. Mary Jane, pot, reefer, weed
6. Beyond the Valley of the Dolls
5. 30 Lb housecats
4. Bacon
3. Double necked Jimmy Page guitars
2. Bruce Lee, Jimi Hendrix(tie)
1. girls
Posted: Jun 12, 2007 9:25 pm
 
shade trees
car windows
popsicles
water park at peabody park
rubbing alcohol evaporation technique
wind
short hair
low humidity
porch swings
zz top
Posted: Jun 12, 2007 9:30 pm
 
10. Mashed Potatoes
9. Sharp knives
8. Red
7. Morgan Freeman
6. Baboons
5. The Grand Canyon
4. Candy
3. Throwing rocks
2. Guitars
1. Coca Cola
Posted: Jun 12, 2007 9:30 pm
 
2) inner-city black kids that talk like film noir private eyes

have you heard the "MC Blowfish" segment from the Digital Underground song "Underwater Rhymes?"

If there's one thing better than an inner city black kid talking like a film noir private eye, it's someone rapping like a film noir private eye while also pretending to be a sea creature. Highly recommended.
Posted: Jun 12, 2007 9:38 pm
 
10. Van Halen "II"
9. giant 2 LB Steak Florentine
8. Yueng Ling Beer
7. Mary Jane, pot, reefer, weed
6. Beyond the Valley of the Dolls
5. 30 Lb housecats
4. Bacon
3. Double necked Jimmy Page guitars
2. Bruce Lee, Jimi Hendrix(tie)
1. girls



all around closest so far!
Posted: Jun 12, 2007 9:40 pm
 
cuz it has bacon.
Posted: Jun 12, 2007 10:10 pm
 
2[i]) inner-city black kids that talk like film noir private eyes [/i]

Is that the movie with the kid from 10 Things I hate about you. Where he is looking for some girl that disappeared? And they talk like they are from a 50s detective movie?
Posted: Jun 12, 2007 10:26 pm
 
If there's one thing better than an inner city black kid talking like a film noir private eye, it's someone rapping like a film noir private eye while also pretending to be a sea creature. Highly recommended.

I'm finding this tonight!
Posted: Jun 12, 2007 10:53 pm | Edited by: elle
 
11. smokin' funny lefthanded cigs
10. roller skating
9. grilled food
8. being able to read for recreation again
7. midafternoon naps
6. sangria
5. porch swings (with you on that one, fern.)
4. free tomatoes (my dad's growing the hell out of them!)
3. air conditioning
2. pistachio ice cream
1. runnin' through other people's yard sprinklers while out for a walk.

(had to add 11 since i've been enjoyin' that a lil bit lately more so than usual.)
Posted: Jun 12, 2007 11:32 pm
 
-Garden sprinklers that look like cows
-My well seasoned charcoal grill the wife keeps trying to convince me to throw out/replace (A generation of garage rockers have ate food prepared off that grill...Maybe I should put it on eBay)
-The left and right seperation on "Can't Ya Hear Me Knockin'"
-Offspring taking over the lawn mowing duties
-Peter O'Toole
-Cold Bell's Beer (any style)
-Old Technics recievers
-The first strawberries of the year
-Wayne Kramer in 1969
-That crazy goat out at a friend of mine's farm
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 12:42 am
 
No one has mentioned Skeeball. You are all completely worthless.
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 12:43 am
 
beer
weed
records
sex
money
food
guitar
drums
books
pet goats
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 12:46 am | Edited by: Alisa
 
driving (roadtrips)
wind
riding the Maid in the Mist at Niagara Falls
red wine
photoshop
books
documentaries
office supplies
Johnny Singer
being in Vilas, NC

oh, and fercrissakes, CHEESE!
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 12:49 am | Edited by: queenothetwist
 
Now wait
a minute,
Mr. Socks Fox!
When a fox is
in the bottle where
the tweetle beetles battle
with their paddles
in a puddle on a
noodle-eating poodle,
THIS is what they call...
... a tweetle beetle
noodle poodle bottled
paddled muddled duddled
fuddled wuddled
fox in socks, sir!
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 1:30 am
 
i nixed time travel. don't really care about it that much!

speakers that look like rocks. pretty cool.
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 1:52 am
 
I was eyeing up some of those speakers that look like rocks today. Came home and stuck speakers in the windows instead.
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 2:02 am
 
i shoved speakers up kathys cunt and they smell like carp.

its not so cool.
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 2:54 am
 
10. Lasers
9. pinstriped suits
8. lawn darts
7. redheaded chicks
6. the way black folks say muthafucka
5. Keith Richards
4. chrome
3. hardwood floors
2. flying fish
1. ultra-slow motion photography
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 3:38 am
 
10. washing the windows of an "adult novelty" store and getting to chuckle at all the schmucks going in and out.
9. cutting off giant SUV's on the interstate in rush hour with my even giant-er van.
8. my boomchick t-shirt that everyone keeps eyeballing.
7. zebra striped dogs
6. the stopwatch theme music in "for a few dollars more"
5. watching kids skateboarding
4. the gretsch billy-bo guitar
3. jfk book depository museum in dallas
2. the cadillac ranch
1. getting published
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 4:01 am
 
1. ultra-lites
2. Marvel Fumetti Book
3. chorizo
4. heat vision
5. Christian, pirate, ventriloquism records
6. Diet Mt Dew
7. changing the lyrics of songs to poop and pee
8. riding a lil train and shooting concrete dinosaurs with plastic machine guns in Irish Hills, MI
9. females that can play drums
10. moogs
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 4:01 am
 
i forgot aftershave!
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 4:11 am | Edited by: dale
 
I wanna ammend my list already(but as a given-it would be a daily thing).

-The right amount if compression and overdrive. It sounds like a tornado of broken glass if ya set it up just right.
-Walking into a Bar where there's an an old guy with a parrot on his shoulder. The parrot likes to say "Motherfucker" a lot.
-M 80's
-Females that really look good in a sundress
-Records that have not only high end but midrange and low end too.
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 4:17 am
 
Records that have not only high end but midrange and low end too.
but, all records have that!!!
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 4:26 am
 
No they don't.
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 4:37 am
 
but, but!!!
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 4:56 am
 
1. Pumas (animal not the shoes)
2. Harry Dean Stanton
3. Moon Shoes
4. Violence
5. Reuben Sandwiches
6. Dr. Strange
7. Prison Literature
8. Marvel Vs Capcom 2
9. Cold Wave
10. My Miss May 1968 Plaboy Playmate Jigsaw Puzzle that my girlfriend gave to me.

honorable mention:the T-1000 liquid terminator
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 5:26 am
 
I) Racist Cartoones.
II) Blowjobbes.
III) Pretending You're British.
IV) Animals Who Act in Film, or Get Drunk/High.
V) Salt.
VI) The Internet (A Major Source of Racist Cartoones).
VII) All Things Related to The Sea (Including Pelicans, Ships of Yore, Cartoon Peg Legs, Giant Squid, Imitation Crabmeat, and Narwahls)
VIII) Clock Radios That Magically Set Themselves, and Atomic Clocks (A Form of Clock Radio)
IX) Anything Post-Apocalyptic
X) That Guy and His Son Who Beat Up That Baseball Coach
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 5:41 am
 
Females that really look good in a sundress

don't they all?
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 5:42 am
 
i am not allowed to post lists.
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 6:20 am
 
Rachel,
Did you see that Ryan Adams top ten hair metal song list?
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 6:24 am
 
X) That Guy and His Son Who Beat Up That Baseball Coach

forgotten, but not gone!
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 6:44 am
 
Ammended again

-The Hippie guy in the hippie bus at the Bus races
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 10:14 am
 
10. Drunken pensioners
9. Lying down
8. Crotchless jodhpurs
7. Burning/breaking stuff
6. Waking up drunk
5. Floating on a pool, drinking booze
4. Swimming dogs (and their smell when wet)
3. Girls in the summertime
2. Dogs doing any kind of sport(s)
1. Girls playing water polo with dogs in the summertime
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 12:19 pm
 
thin walls and the babe next door is moaning loud on her 4th orgasm

three todlers crying in the check out line

2am at Dick's on 45th
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 3:41 pm
 
1. records
2. fuckin' w/o producing
3. cheeseburgers
4. the bo diddley beat
5. psychedelia
6. be bop
7. light sabers
8. things that get you drunk or high
9. mexican food
10. lamb puppies
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 4:31 pm
 
11. MIKE LONG!!!
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 7:54 pm
 
No one has mentioned Skeeball. You are all completely worthless.

i actually played skeeball this past weekend for the first time in almost 10 years. skeeball rules!!
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 8:59 pm | Edited by: Miss Faye
 
5. donating to the MS Society MS150 ride

Hey, I did the Memphis one last year--were you on it? I'm not sure I'm up for it this year.

Oh wait, I just saw you're in Milwaukee. Well, good for you anyway!!!
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 9:14 pm
 
5. donating to the MS Society MS150 ride

Hey, I did the Memphis one last year--were you on it? I'm not sure I'm up for it this year.


My boss (who's 53) did it last year; he's on the fence about doing it again also.
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 9:47 pm
 
1. MDMA
2. Boobs
3. Hardwood Floors
4. Sweden
5. Indoor Soccer
6. The Jabberwocky
7. Fierce Berry Gatorade
8. Pitchforks
9. Ear Sex
10. Don Rickles
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 9:58 pm
 
1. ass
2.angel food cake and strawberries
3. crack cocaine and the stooges 2nd LP
4. petrus wine
5. sam smith's beer
6. my son
6. cleveland late 70's
7. kent mid 80's
8. shakespeare's tragedies
9. dancing to rockabilly
10. walking on a beach smoking a cuban during sunrise
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 9:58 pm
 
just kidding!

10. mike long
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 10:04 pm | Edited by: Stephanie
 
Oh wait, I just saw you're in Milwaukee. Well, good for you anyway!!!

wish I could take credit, but I can't! A very close friend to me and my family is doing the ride and it fucking rules that she's doing it! I'm setting up a show for the end of July to benefit the ride and all the proceeds are going to her sponsorship. Rock for the Ride! Totally dorky! We're gonna do a silent auction, too (which, Goner! I'm gonna ask again for a donation once I get an offical letter from the society for businesses-hope you guys can help me out again!)

Miss Faye-it's awesome you did it! Did you do 150 miles? (and sixel, i hope your boss does again, too!)
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 10:07 pm
 
Rachel,
Did you see that Ryan Adams top ten hair metal song list?



Why yes I did!!

He's playing GPAC in July -
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 10:22 pm
 
with some borrowed or modified...
1) cat calls
2) baby goats
3) driving a stick shift
4) head (not the same as #3)
5) artichoke hearts
6) great whites
7) willie nelson
8) eyebrows
9) titties
10) tree canopies
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 10:38 pm
 
god, we're all just a regular little match.com, aren't we? (I think I'm especially guilty of this!)
Where's Jack Stands list? And where do unicorns, rainbows, and laser light sabers figure in?
Posted: Jun 13, 2007 10:43 pm
 
oh yeah, laser light sabers....
Posted: Jun 14, 2007 5:59 pm
 
1. People who take you off their Top 10 Friends list on myspace.
Posted: Jun 14, 2007 6:12 pm
 
peanuts (dry roasted or shellies)
Alexander Hamilton
batting cages
dead animals
skate tricks named after dead animals
Roman Numerals
toggle switches
hot interns
hating your parents
Cruisin'
Posted: Jun 14, 2007 7:10 pm | Edited by: letsdanceon
 
1. seeing little kids fall down
2. cars with fins
3. otters
4. scoring a totally sweet thrift store find
5. cheese (agreed!) and more importantly, cheesecake
6. getting sent home from work early and having a whole day to your self unexpectedly
7. old black guys who dress fancy and have nicknames like "smiley"
8. getting paid to hang out in a bar and play your favorite records (and make everyone else hear 'em, whether they wanna or not)
9. good cleavage shirts/dresses
10. taking a picture with lemmy
Posted: Jun 14, 2007 8:33 pm
 
This is in no particular order
1)Vibrators
2)Dildos
3)Butt Plugs
4)Ben Wa Balls
5)Cock Rings
6)Anal Eze (cherry flavor)
7)French Ticklers
8)Nipple Clamps
9)Anal Beads
10)Turkey Basters
Posted: Jun 14, 2007 9:11 pm | Edited by: johnny guitar
 
1. picking fights with people while they are tripping acid
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