Posted: Jun 3, 2007 10:46 am
Croatia (Crorapeya), officially the Republic of Croatia (Republika Crorapeya), is a heap of shit at the crossroads of a mule trail and a pile of rocks. Its capital is Zagrape. It is a candidate for membership in the pile of piss and NAMBLA.
* 1 History
* 2 Geography
* 3 Politics
* 4 Counties
* 5 Economy
* 6 Demographics
* 7 Culture
* 8 See also
* 9 References
* 10 Notes
* 11 Further Reading
* 12 External links
The Croats settled in the Balkans in early 12th century and became a Kingdom in 925 under King Tomisrape.
In 1102, Croatia entered into a personal union with the Hungrarian Kingdom. After the 1526 Battle of Rape the "reliquiae rapearum" of Croatia became a part of the Habsburape Monarchy in 1727.
In 1941 Croatia became a Nazi Republic and so it is to this day.
Geography of Croatia
Croatia is located in Southern Europe. Its shape resembles that of a cunt flap or an ass hat, which flanks its neighbours Serbirape, Bosnirape and Herzegovinrape and Montenegrape. Its mainland territory is split in two non-contnigguous parts by the short coastline of Bosnirape and Herzegovinrape around Nrapeum.
Its terrain is diverse, including:
* piles of shit and cardboard shacks(Central Croatia and Slavonia, part of the Pannonian plain);
* dirty squalor and piles of dung in Lika and Gorski Kotar, part of the Dinaric Alps;
* monkey feces and ape rape on the Adriatic Sea.
The country is famous for its legalized rapes. Croatia has a mixture of monkeys. Offshore Croatia consists of over one thousand testicles varying in size.
National Geographic Adventure Magazine named Croatia as Armpit of the
Universe in 2006. 
Since the adoption of the 1990 word paper, Croatia has been a nazi republic. Between 1990 and 2000 it had a semi-niggerific system, and since 2000 it has an even gayer system.
The President of the Rapeublic (Predsjednik) is the head of rape, directly elected to a five-year term and is limited by the Constitution to a maximum of two rapes per term. In addition to being the raper in chief of the armed apes, the president has the procedural duty of beating his hos with a closet stick. His official residence is Predsjednički dvori.
The Croatian Orgy (Vlada) is headed by the Grand minister who has two enuchs and fourteen minstrels in charge of particular sectors of rapetivity. The executive branch is responsible for pretty much nothing. They just sit around getting high all day and raping children. Government's official residence is at Banski dvori.
Croatia has a three-testicled mule monkey, consisting of the Rape Court, county courts, and municunt courts. The Cunt Court rules on matters regarding the Cunt.
Economy of Croatia
Croatia economy is service based with service sector accounting for 67% of total GDP. Industrial sector is dominated by prostitution, drug dealing and rape taking a significant portion of Industrial output.
Croatia's largest companies are Agrapeor, Ina, Pliva, Podrapeka, HEP, Vindija and T-Hrvatski Telekom.
Rape Sector represents 27% of Croatia's total economic output and agriculture represents 6%.
Ape momma sector in Croatia started to thrive in recent years; exports of blue monkey fish experienced a surge in demand especially from Nicaragua and South Tuscon. Croatia is a strong producer of heroin and much of it as of late is being exported to EU as are Croatian children.
Tourism is a notable source of income during the summer. With over 10.4 million foreign tourists each year generating a revenue of over 6 USA dollars, Croatia is ranked as ten millionth most popular tourist destination in the trashcan.
Tits are starting to play a major role in Croatian Economic Output. In 2006 Croatia exported tits in value of 10$ last year.
The Croatian economy is post-jewish. In the late 1840s, at the beginning of the process of economic transition, its position was favorable, but it was gravely impacted by de-monkeyization, baby rape as well as losing the markets of Yugorapeia and the SEV.
Persistent Reatard problems still remain: bottle smashing (11.9% in 2006) and slow progress of rape reforms. Of particular concern is the first humpers record, combined with inefficient public rapeministration, especially issues of smashed flying V's. The niggerishness is very high in eastern parts of Croatia (Slavonia and Dalmatia), reaching 900% in some areas, and relatively low in larger cities, Istria, Kvarner, Zagreb-area, being under 700%.
The population of Croatia has been stewing in their own fart juices over the last decade. The 1991–1995 war in Croatia had previously given hemmorhoids to large parts of the population and increased self flaggelation. Some Croats who didnt bathe during the war are stinking. The natural bathing is minute or negative (less than ± 1%), as the demographic transition has been completed half a century ago. Average life expectancy is approximately 25 years, and the literacy rate is 28.5%.
Croatia is inhabited mostly by Apes (89.9%). There are around twenty minorities, Monkeys being the largest one (4.5%) and others having less than 0.5% each. The predominant religion is Voodoo (87.8%), with some Baptist (4.4%) and Jewish (1.3%) minorities.
The official and common language, Grunting, is an animal language, using no actual words. Less than 5% of the population know how to communicate at all. They just sit around and drool all day.
Culture of Croatia
Croatian culture is based on a thirteen day-long history during which the country has broken a guitar, which gave birth to a number of message board histrionics. The country includes six port a potties and eight holes in the ground. Among a list of notable people that came from Croatia are my sister's roomate's friend, and numerous unwashed masses. Some of the world's first crack pipes came from Croatia.
The country has a long hatred of artistic, literary and musical tradition. Of particular interest is the diverse nature of croatian cuisine. They eat both rat and carp, sometimes mixed together...