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Goner Message Board / ???? / Out of the mouths of babes..
Posted: Apr 27, 2007 2:23 pm
 
Driving the jr. millionaires today-

There was a very serious discussion in the back seat regarding who was better boy singers or girl singers while listening to the Detroit Cobras.

From the female jr. millionaire"Girls can do some stuff better. Except I think that Mr. Shakes-Alot (Ed O.) sings Stop and Think it Over better. Mary Weiss messed it up, I think Mr. S hakes-Alot should only sing that one. He's the best singer"

rebuttal from the male jr. millionaire "Well, boys sing some stuff better. Like the Zombies and Greg Oblivian and Eric Oblivian and Harlan and daddy's band. They are better singers"
Posted: Apr 27, 2007 3:27 pm
 
"Dad, don't be stupid."
- My son, after asking if he'd like a knuckle sandwich for lunch, instead of a cheese sandwich.
Posted: Apr 27, 2007 3:31 pm
 
mabel (4) asked me last night if i had "sex with mommy" when i was in high school. she had no idea what she was saying really, but after throwing up, i tried to OD on some pills, but no no avail.
Posted: Apr 27, 2007 3:32 pm
 
Play them some Ted Taylor and ask them what they think.
Posted: Apr 27, 2007 3:33 pm
 
Kids say the darndest things.
Posted: Apr 27, 2007 3:41 pm
 
My dad always used to ask me if I'd like a mouth full of bloody chiklets. I never called him stupid after that, though.
Posted: Apr 27, 2007 4:08 pm
 
Favorite thing recently:

"If you don't believe me you can just ask the government!" When being asked about homework

"my spine hurts" Pointing to her shin
Posted: Apr 27, 2007 4:28 pm
 
while listening to Funky Blackouts:
"This song sounds like anger"

"If a band wants to rock, then they should just name every one of their songs 'Rock' or 'Rock and Roll'"


....so I'm in a band with a 6 year old, and we have 3 songs named "Rock"...
Posted: Apr 27, 2007 4:32 pm
 
"If a band wants to rock, then they should just name every one of their songs 'Rock' or 'Rock and Roll'"


AWESOME!!!
Posted: Apr 27, 2007 4:52 pm
 
Not so much what he said...

My three year old nephew was sitting on my sisters lap while she was at her computer. He looked at her and asked:

"Mom, where do the dinosaurs live?"

My sister answered,"Oh honey, the dinosaurs are all dead."

My nephew just put his head down, stuck out his lip and started crying. I guess it broke his heart to find out that dinosaurs aren't just out there roaming around somewhere.
Posted: Apr 27, 2007 4:55 pm
 
I guess it broke his heart to find out that dinosaurs aren't just out there roaming around somewhere.

i bet he was talking about dinosaur jr.
Posted: Apr 27, 2007 5:17 pm
 
just now male jr millionaire:

"Banana nut bread isn't good for you"

me "why not?"

"because I don't like it"
Posted: Apr 27, 2007 5:20 pm
 
wow. I think he's gonna crack me up all day today

"Don't let the kitty in the bathroom - so he doesn't eat the paint"

me "huh? there's no wet paint"

"oh yeah, you said he can't eat the tentacles" (chemicals)
Posted: Apr 27, 2007 5:31 pm | Edited by: queenothetwist
 
i might got you all beat; i've got an autistic 7 year old son. i don't probably even need to give you any quotes for you to imagine what comes out of his face every day.

between him and my overly fashion conscious 5 year old... i give up.
Posted: Apr 27, 2007 5:38 pm
 
I nominate this thread title for the "name my soft core porn" thread.
Posted: Apr 27, 2007 5:53 pm
 
I nominate this thread title for the "name my soft core porn" thread.

Ha!!! I second that!!!
Posted: Apr 27, 2007 6:18 pm
 
My son thinks that there should be stomp boxes for bands that cause things to blow up when stepped on.

He wrote a song called "the blood is out" when he was 6.

Also, when he was 6, he told me that I "don't know as much as he does because I was born a long time ago". Little bastard's probably right, but it still hurt, nonetheless.

Oh yeah, he also used to call "beer" "beard". "Dad, don't drink any more beard today."
Posted: Apr 27, 2007 6:20 pm
 
"Dad, don't drink any more beard today."


Not nearly as embarrassing as going into the corner grocery, and having the boy point to the beer section, calling it "Daddy Juice".
Posted: Apr 27, 2007 6:22 pm
 
while on tour of the Jack Daniels distillery I heard a kid scream out "Hey - that smells like grandpa!"
Posted: Apr 27, 2007 6:25 pm
 
beer section, calling it "Daddy Juice".

precious.

while on tour of the Jack Daniels distillery I heard a kid scream out "Hey - that smells like grandpa!"

coooooooool.
Posted: Apr 27, 2007 6:52 pm
 
Lookit how cute my little herc'les is!

-Mrs x
Posted: Apr 27, 2007 6:52 pm
 
Not nearly as embarrassing as going into the corner grocery, and having the boy point to the beer section, calling it "Daddy Juice".


Ha ha ha!

Once, at a hotel pool, my son told me that, if I won at marco polo (not sure really how you "win" at that, but...), my prize would be a bucket of beer because that's my favorite thing in the world. I noticed other adults scowling at me from across the pool.
Posted: Apr 27, 2007 7:33 pm
 
A couple of weeks ago, my boyfriend, my sister and I took my little brother out for sushi. As we were paying the bill, out of nowhere he blurted out "Chinaman's trading post!" which is the name of a fake card game from my childhood that I'd just told him about the day before. After some scowls from the staff and other patrons, we left and I had to explain to him why it wasn't funny. Even though it was.
Posted: May 4, 2007 2:44 am
 
KINDERGARTEN kids in ritzy L.A. suburb Calabasas have been coming home to
their parents and talking about the "weird man" who keeps coming to their
class to sing "scary" songs on his guitar. The "weird" one turns out to be
Bob Dylan, whose grandson (Jakob Dylan's son) attends the school. He's been
singing to the kindergarten class just for fun, but the kiddies have no idea
they're being serenaded by a musical legend - to them, he's just Weird
Guitar Guy.

http://www.nypost.com/seven/05032007/gossip/pagesix/easily_scared_page six_.htm
Posted: May 4, 2007 4:27 am
 
Yesterday, a first grader in my class told another little girl that he was going to fuck her in her booty.
He went home and told his parents he said he said "funk" her in her booty.



And that Bob Dylan story is hilarious.
Posted: May 4, 2007 4:32 am
 
And, a double post here, but I can't decide what is funnier/more disturbing... him saying what he said or me repeating it to his mother over the phone.
Posted: May 4, 2007 4:40 am
 
when I was little my grandparents would take me to the museums and shit in D.C., which during the 1980's was like homeless wino mecca.. anyway, I was asking my grandparents what was up with all the bums sleeping on steam grates and shit, and they told me "oh, those are street people."

anyway, we get out of the car on 14th street and there's bums galore near the treasury building. I was pointing at them and yelling "LOOK GRANDMA!!! STREET PEOPLE!!"

My grandmother was mortified. My teenaged cousin thought it was hilarious.
Posted: May 4, 2007 4:50 am
 
a first grader in my class


I don't think you're old enough to be posting here
Posted: May 4, 2007 4:59 am
 
don't tell my parents!
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