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Goner Message Board / ???? / what kind of toilet paper should I buy?
littlefellow
Posted: Dec 24, 2003 11:16 pm
 
I need to know what kind of toilet paper to get. I am in a jam. Any thoughts would be helpfull.
toilet paper rocks
Posted: Dec 25, 2003 12:28 am
 
Steal some from Carl's Jr. They got the good rough stuff.
littlefellow
Posted: Dec 26, 2003 7:08 am
 
THANK YOU GOOD BUDDY!
uleeshuh
Posted: Dec 27, 2003 1:36 am
 
just not swedish toilet paper...
STARCHILD
Posted: Dec 28, 2003 7:15 am
 
NEVER EVER SHAKE A SOMALI'S LEFT HAND.
STARCHILD
Posted: Dec 28, 2003 7:16 am
 
NEVER EVER SHAKE A SOMALI'S LEFT HAND.
guy
Posted: Dec 29, 2003 2:49 pm
 
They use the same hand in India.
toilet paper rocks
Posted: Dec 30, 2003 7:33 am
 
If all else fails, stick yer ass in the shower.
Nanne Tepper
Posted: Dec 30, 2003 1:09 pm
 
Are you people French?
* When having The Bubblies: wet toiletpaper or you'll be shitting Hot Sauce through your butthole in no time.
* When enjoying a Wooden Pickle: if it comes out nice and smooth one whipe with any kinda paper will do.
* When the pickle breaks you'll be whiping till next chrissemess anyway so use the soft stuff, but not the wet paper or you'll be shoeshining your ass.
* The best thing to do is wash yr ass after each turd, but don't hang it in your wife's pussybath.

Rough toiletpaper is a bitch in every case. Be gentil to your asshole at any time.

(In France they have paper that only smears and doesn't wipe, and still: all these French macho's are the most fanatic buttfuckers around.)

Whiping Your Ass Is No Laughing Matter!

nickg
Posted: Dec 30, 2003 8:12 pm
 
i love you, nanne.
5thAve
Posted: Dec 30, 2003 8:22 pm
 
the Bubblies? Wooden Pickle? When the pickle breaks? Pussybath?
I declare "culture shock".
Nanne Tepper
Posted: Dec 30, 2003 8:33 pm
 
It's all in The Dutch Professional Asshole Manifesto.
Nanne Tepper
Posted: Dec 30, 2003 8:42 pm
 
(Does sound like a Led Zeppelin song: When The Pickle Breaks)
Dickie Appleshortz
Posted: Dec 30, 2003 9:19 pm
 
Nanne,
Glad to have you aboard the writing "staff" at Horizontal Action. You're already doing great!
Nanne Tepper
Posted: Dec 30, 2003 11:05 pm
 
thanks! (I'll bring a shiny bright, polished asshole to the Staff, hope I don't fail my final tests!)
SAMBEAUX
Posted: Jan 12, 2004 7:26 pm
 
Man, I'm glad that the goner board could be of some use to Paul Williams.
http://members.aol.com/KevsWeb/Williams/williams.htm

You know, he co-wrote "Broken Hearts are for Assholes" with Zappa...

dutch hercules
Posted: Jan 19, 2004 12:09 pm
 
Dont use any. Just use your favorite christian rock band t-shirt. The band will forgive you.
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