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Goner Message Board / ???? / Favorite mean phrases...
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 5:51 pm
Eat a bag of dick.
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 5:54 pm
"I had you and you bored me" - I saw a t-shirt with this on it
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 5:59 pm
you crummy fag.
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 6:01 pm
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 6:46 pm
Your Daddy drinks because you cry.
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 6:50 pm
"Drop dead, you poisonous cunt." I wanted to hurl this one at my mother-in-law last weekend.
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 6:52 pm
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 6:54 pm
This isn't necessarily a mean phrase but it's pretty mean when you're eating some cunt and you puke on the cunt. The cunt can't really tell what happened but the owner of the cunt can.
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 6:59 pm
MAN: (digging corned beef out of teeth) "That's funny, I didn't have corned beef for lunch. I think I'm going to be sick."
WOMAN: "That's what the last guy said."
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 7:41 pm | Edited by: elle
i go with the perennial favorite "go fuck yourself" or maybe "douchebag". it's simple enough. i don't feel like expending creative energy on people i don't like.
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 7:53 pm
Acording to Earles, this phrase is no longer a viable option. Try "ass casserole".

Posted: Apr 14, 2006 7:55 pm
ass casserole has too much alliteration. makes it sound like you worked too hard to come up with it. like i said, i don't like using brain cells on people i don't like. i would much rather use something like that teasing one of my friends, so it wouldn't be MEAN really.
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 7:58 pm
The meanest I get is "bite me". And that's not mean, is it?
"Fuck you", "fuck off" and "shut the fuck up" and "fuck you and the horse you rode in on" are my favorite old standbys.
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 7:59 pm
"Eat shit and die" was the favorite when I was growing up.
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 7:59 pm | Edited by: Hugh Jass
This one is in Yiddish and sounds 10x as menacing that way than it does in English: "Got zol gebn, er zol hobn altsding vos zayn harts glist, nor er zol zayn geleymt oyf ale ayvers un nit kenen rirn mit der tsun!"

It loosely means "Phuck that dude!"

Literally translated it means, "God should give him everything his heart desires, but he should be a quadriplegic and not be able to use his tongue."
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 8:01 pm
That's beautiful, Hugh.
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 8:07 pm
That's beautiful, Hugh.

i agree.
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 8:08 pm
Actually, Hugh, that's also very similar to a Southern lingo trick. You can say the meanest thing you want about a person if you preface the tyrade with the phrase "Bless his/her/their heart(s), but....."
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 8:14 pm
I like to specify where people can get fucked, as in "fuck your mouth" or "fuck you in the nose" a la Jon Wayne. I also like to call over-styled rockabillies "Fonzie". A recent fave is "Myspace" for dudes in girlpants or that stupid haircut.
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 8:15 pm
"Fuck you you fucking fuck!!!"
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 9:02 pm
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 9:07 pm
"You could fuck up a wet dream."
"You don't know your ass from a hole in the ground."
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 9:08 pm
Go play in traffic.
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 9:10 pm
"Go piss up a rope."
"Shit or get off the pot."
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 9:11 pm
why dont you take a long walk off a short pier
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 9:19 pm
Creep, you got 32 teeth. Wanna try for none?
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 9:21 pm
I've seen better heads on a mug of beer!
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 9:25 pm
do your parents know youre gay?
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 9:26 pm
"yer face is so ugly, it looks like it caught on fire, and somebody put it out with a rake."
"baby, yer so fat that when we have sex, I have to roll you in flour to find your wet spot."
"you couldn't get laid in a morgue."
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 9:29 pm
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 9:31 pm
"you couldn't get laid in a morgue."

You couldn't get nailed in wood shop.
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 9:32 pm | Edited by: Arturo
rat soup eating motharfucka
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 9:34 pm
farging cork sucker!
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 9:55 pm
dummy. just plain ol'e dummy. " Laura Ingalls, your Jew Ass brother, Albert is a dummy... hey Albert got any morphine?.JEWBOY!!! ha ha.."
Posted: Apr 14, 2006 10:57 pm

This works great with the open hand to someone's face gesture. Try it on a Greek guy to see if it works.
Posted: Apr 15, 2006 12:12 am
Posted: Apr 15, 2006 12:17 am
"shit and fall back in it" is a funny one I heard
Posted: Apr 15, 2006 12:28 am
The classic "...and the horse you rode in on" still works today.

This one is more of a threat than an insult, but I love it: "I'll hit you so hard, I'll kill your whole family!"
Posted: Apr 15, 2006 12:37 am
Longmont potion castle's "dirk funk" phone call...

you know who yyer talkin to?
dirk funk
the bringer of pain to your face
more like my cleat
put the tennis racket to yer lip
Posted: Apr 15, 2006 1:17 am
I don't come down to where you work and knock the Dick out of your mouth.
Posted: Apr 15, 2006 1:53 am
"We don't swim in your toilet, so don't pee in our pool."
"I don't drink in your bed, so don't passs out in my bar."
Posted: Apr 15, 2006 3:56 am
you don't know shit from shine-ola, numb nuts
Posted: Apr 15, 2006 4:05 am
"We don't swim in your toilet, so don't pee in our pool."


Surf Punks rule!
Posted: Apr 15, 2006 1:58 pm
Posted: Jun 16, 2009 4:06 pm
You Must Have Been Born On a Highway, That's Where Most Accidents Happen.
Posted: Jun 16, 2009 4:13 pm | Edited by: Rumpleforeskin
Ge Kakken affen yam!(spelling prolly wrong)=Go shit in the ocean(lake?).
Stick it up your ass and turn on it.
Posted: Jun 16, 2009 4:34 pm
"I'll jump in the air and shit in your hair"
Sputnik Monroe
Posted: Jun 16, 2009 4:42 pm
mung tummy
Posted: Jun 16, 2009 6:07 pm
"at least your band is better than the infections."
Posted: Jun 16, 2009 6:15 pm
Everyone knows that "Lame-o Fuck-face" is the new "Eat a bag of dicks."

Also, "I hope you get punched in the cunt with AIDS."
Posted: Jun 16, 2009 6:35 pm
"You should go home and slap your mother for not aborting you"
Posted: Jun 17, 2009 8:34 am
'I'm gonna kick your asshole off!'
Posted: Jun 17, 2009 9:10 am
Lately it's all about the hole.

Posted: Jun 17, 2009 9:36 am
Posted: Jun 17, 2009 9:37 am
I've been partial to "douche tool" lately.
Posted: Jun 17, 2009 9:48 am
"please fucking kill yourself already"
Posted: Jun 17, 2009 10:50 am
"Fuck you you fucking fuck!!!"
the best one to me

"Fuck" does NOT stand for "for unlawful carnal knowledge" or
"fornication under consent of the king". It is not an acronym for
anything at all.

It is a very old word, recorded in English since the 15th
century (few acronyms predate the 20th century), with cognates
in other Germanic languages. The Random House Historical
Dictionary of American Slang (Random House, 1994, ISBN
0-394-54427-7) cites Middle Dutch "fokken" = "to thrust, copulate
with"; Norwegian dialect "fukka" = "to copulate"; and Swedish
dialect "focka" = "to strike, push, copulate" and "fock" = "penis".
Although German "ficken" may enter the picture somehow, it is
problematic in having e-grade, or umlaut, where all the others have
o-grade or zero-grade of the vowel.

AHD1, following Pokorny, derived "feud", "fey", "fickle", "foe",
and "fuck" from an Indo-European root "*peig2" = "hostile"; but
AHD2 and AHD3 have dropped this connection for "fuck" and give no
pre-Germanic etymon for it. Eric Partridge, in the 7th edition of
"Dictionary of Slang and Unconventional English" (Macmillan, 1970),
said that "fuck" "almost certainly" comes from the Indo-European
root "*peuk-" = "to prick" (which is the source of the English words
"compunction", "expunge", "impugn", "poignant", "point", "pounce",
"pugilist", "punctuate", "puncture", "pungent", and "pygmy").
Robert Claiborne, in "The Roots of English: A Reader's Handbook of
Word Origin" (Times, 1989) agrees that this is "probably" the
etymon. Problems with such theories include a distribution that
suggests a North-Sea Germanic areal form rather than an inherited
one; the murkiness of the phonetic relations; and the fact that no
alleged cognate outside Germanic has sexual connotations.
Posted: Jun 17, 2009 11:35 am
"feud", "fey", "fickle", "foe",

when i read that, it sounded like this:

Posted: Jun 17, 2009 11:43 am
dry up
flake off
and blow away
Posted: Jun 17, 2009 11:46 am
Lapdances are only fun if the stripper is crying.
Posted: Jun 17, 2009 2:19 pm
really, who can hate the 3 stooges
Posted: Jun 17, 2009 2:21 pm
Posted: Jun 17, 2009 2:25 pm
i think his doing that actually means he loves the 3 stooges
Posted: Jun 17, 2009 2:26 pm
yeah but he's not doing it now
Posted: Jun 17, 2009 2:49 pm
was, is, and always will be:

"suck a fart out of my ass!"
Posted: Jun 17, 2009 2:51 pm
my all time favorite put down to a drunk girl in a bar who butted into a conversation a couple years ago: "go wax your mustache ugly, no one asked you."
Posted: Jun 17, 2009 2:56 pm
i think his doing that actually means he loves the 3 stooges
meaning him backing out shows he loves them.
Posted: Jun 17, 2009 4:14 pm
weeping mancunt

and everyone involved with that three stooges thing should be drawn and quartered
Posted: Jun 17, 2009 7:53 pm
butt rott!
Posted: Jun 17, 2009 8:08 pm
Go die.
Posted: Jun 17, 2009 9:11 pm
Fuck Stain
Posted: Jun 18, 2009 6:45 am
she's got a head like a smashed crab / dropped pie / welder's bench
Posted: Jun 18, 2009 9:17 am
dirty old matress
Posted: Jun 18, 2009 3:21 pm
Lapdance is so much better when the stripper is crying.

i love that song
Posted: Jun 18, 2009 5:38 pm
dirty old matress

or mattress back..
Posted: Jun 18, 2009 5:45 pm
the stuff at the bottom of her panties was like punching an eclaire.
Posted: Jun 18, 2009 5:52 pm
i think his doing that actually means he loves the 3 stooges

I think they should recast Christian Bale as Larry and see if he'll convert to Judaism and acquire male pattern baldness for the role.
Posted: Jun 18, 2009 5:53 pm
oh yeah, and what I came here for:

Goddamn Pig
Posted: Jun 19, 2009 4:15 am
"You should go home and slap your mother for not aborting you"

good one; I could say that to about half this fucking state
Posted: Jun 19, 2009 11:50 am
douche canoe
Posted: Jun 19, 2009 12:04 pm
"Your cunt smells like a baby's coffin!"
-Patton Oswalt
Posted: Jun 19, 2009 2:23 pm
"ugly as a hat full of arseholes"
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