Yeah, and no smartass shit about the rain. Already know about the goddamn rain, ok?

What exactly do you want to know?

Bryant,as the only person from Jet City that seems to post on this thing that lives here,i'm yer man! Unfortunately,i gotta go to work right now,so my ranting and raving has to wait until i get off my shift!Stay Tuned...

I'm considering a move to the West Coast (again) with this time being a lot more serious and thought out. I gotta look at schools, public transportation, general level of rocknroll present, how late the bars and liquor stores stay open...etc...etc
I'm trying to weigh Seattle against other places in the region including Sacremento (don't think so), San Jose (maybe), Portland (Didn't Louie say that place sucked?)
Im a godamn drunk fool for putting this thread on the Upcoming Shows forum..

I really dug Portland even though I was only there for three days. There are killer records to be dug up at Crossroads. Good bars. Good transportation system. Killer weed. I dig Reno too. It's only a 4 hour drive to San Francisco and 1/2 hour to Lake Tahoe, one of the most beuatiful spots on Earth. Plus one of The Monks lives there and he'll hang out, too.

avoid sacramento

Portland ate my soul. Too much good blow.

Yup,Portland's alright if you like Coke,which i don't,so i left!

I've been in Seattle a little over a year,and i must say it's treated me right!I always seemed to have pertty good luck there when i would visit from PDX (and back in the 80s when i had a HC Punk penpal there),so when the elements of no job,no place to live,and Cocaine Worship all came together at once,it seemed like a good time to go!

What i'm gonna do w/ this post is try to give ya a heads up on The Good ,The Bad ,and The Ugly ( in no particular order)on one of America's great cities. But first,a disclaimer:
1) i'm an old man,i only care about Matlock;
2) any views expressed are those of Human Garbage Disposal only.In other words,it's EXTREMELY SUBJECTIVE and might be different from your own experience here!

Let's start by taking a look at the different neighborhoods that make up my fair city:

CAPITOL HILL: Hipster/Homo Fuckin' Central! Over 15,000 (!) people occupy this roughly 1/2 mile area,all of 'em either Rainbow Sportin' Gay or 20-30 Something Boho/Countercultural types being professionally cool,er,i mean,radically subversive and stickin' it to The Man every day just by being alive!!! Hollywood has SilverLake,Baton Rouge has Chimes St.,every city has a neighborhood like this,Cap Hill is Seattle's version.Pretty action packed nitelife,i'm always excited to get here (when i leave my own 'hood to run errands,drink,etc),but always feel i'm in a casting call for MTV2 by the end of my experience.
BELLTOWN:This 'hood used to be a haven for bums,but encroaching Yuppiedom (which itself is replacing the Urban Hipster Invasion of the early 90s that put some fancy schmancy Rock Clubs and other "lifestyle bars" there)
has priced out MOST of the vermin from that area.Bums passing out or pissing ,shooting up,etc,in liberal Public Gardens make pretty entertaining news items from time to time.This wrteup also describes nearby QUEEN ANNE,except there's no bums OR Rock n' Roll there!
U DISTRICT:This is where the U of Washington is,hence the name.Ground Zero for hottie College Gurls that don't like me saying hello to them,but might think you're cute!Make sure to bring some extra change for all the Crusty Punk kids,their dogs,and bums waiting to go back and drink in the alleys of Belltown or the Hill! Street 'improvements' haven't fucked w/ the local,um,flavor yet.Did i mention they had a massive Fart Boy Riot on Greek Row last week yet?

ROOSEVELT/RAVENNA/GREEN LAKE: Yups everywhere,some jog by the Lake that is Green from toxic bacterial sludge.Ravenna Park is beautiful,but look out for "Park Ninjas" when you're drinking at 3AM!

CENTRAL DISTRICT/COLUMBIA CITY/BEACON HILL: Seattle's "Hood",or something like that.Last time i checked,Ranier Ave still has some cool archtecture on it (and was a hub of activity for early R&B,Soul and Jazz back in the day,mid-20th Century),but White Flight(and good ol' Light Rail!) INTO the area may eventually spoil it's identity, as locals are forced to move into cheaper rents in towns like Kent and Renton.

Hey, i know i'm makin it sound bad,but hear me out- and wait for my next post,cuz i gotta go right now...

all i know is i got ripped off at the record store up the street from sonic boom

Thanks guys, Seattle looks like a decent option right now. If I did move there, I would probably have to kick it near the university district. I'm moving with my woman so I can do a higher rent that usual. She's already in Sacto doing Americorps and says Sacramento is lame as hell, though better than Jackson or Myrtle Beach, but it don't take much to blow those places out of the water. I've always had a soft spot for St. Louis personally, since I got to see the kickass Slurs there, but anyway..I'd like to give the West a try for a while.

OK,i'm back...now where was i? Oh yah...

MAGNOLIA: Queen Anne's wealthy dowager older sister.the highest rate of registered Republican voters,the highest Rat infestation levels in the city.Coincidence?

GEORGETOWN/SOUTH PARK/SODO:the industrial heart of C-Town.Boeing's still around here somewhere,and every few years gets written up in the papers as a Destination Location for artists,fartists,etc.Due to shitty bus service, though,this area has never had it's day,and probably never will,but hey,it's the cheapest rents in town (You can get a house in South Park for $650 a month!!!)."SODO" stands for "South Of Downtown",the site of the Kingdome (RIP)and now the site of Safeco Field and Seahawks Stadium,where the White Stripes just played .It is best avoided!

BALLARD:For being founded by a bunch of whitebread Norwegian motherfuckers,this 'hood has a rich history!
I won't go into that here,but i will say that it has kickin' bars and a reallly nice quiet feel while still being able to accomodate Rockarolla retardedness at all hours (4:00 Punk Rock on Sunday afternoons being Prime Example 1!).Beware of condos in the future,but it's still safe now.Could be a "next Capitol Hill",but most Hill types find it too weird or slow,and that's a good thing...
WEST SEATTLE: Some cool ass Industrial ports,beautiful Alki Beach,and lots of nice little neighborhoods full of Grunge-era superstars and their families.Most Likely Place To Find Eddie Vedder Playing Hackey Sack With His Dog (i'm making that up but he does live there, so does Mudhoney members and the great band HEAD!)

GREENWOOD:OK,i saved the best for last here-this place is GOD'S COUNTRY!!!!Lifer drunks,Section 8 freaks,Midgets With Tourettes,armless guys driving Muscle Cars with their feet,Model T's on blocks- a lot of my friends don't like it up here,but the ones that live here know how much this place RULES!Any Portlanders reading this can see a paralell w/ St.John's in No Po but with only the smallest fraction of the outsider hostility!Long dismissed as a "skid row" for rummies,this place is just far enough to be drama free from other 'hoods,close enough to downtown to be a bus ride away! Convenience,Location,Character-what more could you want?

COOL BARS: Comet Tavern,Lobo Saloon,Monkey Pub (sometimes),The Funhouse is opening in the old Zak's space right across from the Space Needle,and Sunset Tavern (the only Rock Club in town i actually like)
SHATTERED BARS:Graceland,Crocodile Cafe,Chop Suey,pertty much any pretentious Rock Club in the city.I favor the Punk Dives,even if they don't always book the best bands,and aren't always as divey as i want 'em to be (insert complaint about there being no Lake Union Pub or Storeroom here).

OTHER FACKS:Public Transpo goes all nite,with "Drunk Buses"(Metro calls'em "Owl Lines") depositing you in most C-Town hoods one every 90 minutes after 2AM (which is Last Call.I know that sux,but there's always some Krazy after show party goin' on so it don't make much of a difference!).
The Dot Com bust has slowed down the economy,but you can still get a shit job starting @ $7.15 Minimum Wage,effective next January.
Folks in The Scene can be pretty standoffish,but there are a lot of cool folks that don't give a shit too.Plus,the Clique Walls are a little more easy to climb than ,say,Portland.

Shit,i could post all day about this city,but i'll save the space and tell you that my house is looking for roommates,so if you were intertested in checking it out,just let us know and we'll do what we can to get you situated,and if you don't like it,a safe passage back.

Portland's great and all,but after a while it just got too small for me.And why in the hell would you wanna live in Scwartzeneggar's California?

Everywhere sucks for some reason after awhile and it really depends on the life yer livin'--if you are a total loser crackhead drunk, life will get depressing fast here...especially in the winter...and though it (Portland) is "small", it is definitely going to get under the ego of anyone who was a bigshot in a smaller, say Southern, town. There are just far too many people doing more than you that could give a shit about who you are/were.

I have been in Portland 3.5 years and it has pluses and minuses...all of them very easy to ignore. There are seriously worse places to live and I have lived in a few of them. I still find this place fairly inexpensive, there is a lot going on for a town of its size and the job scene is defintely on the upswing.

Just sayin'. Seems like the Portland has some haters out there...hmmmm, what could THAT be about?

Remember, the fine folks of Capital Hill shut down Fallout.

I lived there for 3 years before moving to the north, the great white north that is. Vancouver is fun, but Seattle does rock. I often make the trek down for great shoes at the Sunset or Zak's/Funhouse (when are they opening that?). Pretty much everything HGD said is right on, my only advice...Avoid Queen Anne like the plague. That hill is steeper than shit.

Thanks again guys, you've been a big help. I like the sound of Seattle better than Sacto or LA, and I just don't know about Portland, though I'm sure there is plenty of cool stuff there too. For the record, I've never been a big shot ever, anywhere . Not even for my birthday. word to your mother.

Sacto is TERRIBLE. Seattle is pretty awright...lots to do and you will feel like you are living in a "real city", if that is the experience you are looking for. San Francisco is great too, I don't care what anyone has to say about the matter.

JOE- congrats on the SPITS thrasher bit... you made it when you get in thrasher!

good old wez lundry- he did the oblivians thing in there way, way back when!

Thanks,Eric! I liked how the interview turned out,band photo too other than the fact that THERE'S NO BASS PLAYER IN THE PICTURE!!!!Still,i was fuggin' stoked to see it!I been reading about bands in Thrasher for years,now i'm in it! Cool!

Firey,ya shouldn't let those fools in Stumptown bring ya down!Why,last time i checked,nothing cool was ever invented in Portland!I mean,really,you have Sun Records and they have,uh,NOTHING! You can lay claim to Johnny Cash,The Killer,Rufus Thomas,Booker T & The MGs,countless not-as- famous-but-just-as-good standard setters of musical excellence,they have what? QUASI? FUCK 'EM!!!!!!!

As a matter of fact,The Pose City ain't even a real Rn'R Town!According to Dave Marsh's
"Louie Louie" book,before Paul Revere & The Raiders moved to PDX from Idaho (Fuckin'IDAHO,mind you!),the big musical trend was folk shit like the Brothers 4 and Kingston Trio (who i sorta like but i'm making a point here!So much for my "Garage" cred)and there were NO Rock N' Roll combos before them!!! After them came The Kingsmen,Don&The Goodtimes,etc.,but what if the Raiders decided not to move to Portland,hmmm?
I think a big reason i feel this way is because of when i moved here.When i got into town back in 95,there was NOBODY that had good taste in Music!Either you were a 28 year old 80s Hardcore VFW Hall burnout combing your receding mohawk into a devil lock (and thus ruining The Misfits for me AGAIN),or you were a L.U.G. going to Reed College or the Ragweed/Pollen/Cat Dander mother fucker that hung out with them,bitching about the "good old days" at the X-Ray Cafe! You'd go to a show or party and talk about trying to start a band with someone and they'd either not know what the hell you were talking about or usually said something like "Oh,you like The Mummies? Dude,that shit is fuckin' stupid!"(uttered by a member of the Galaxy Trio,a fuckin' SURF BAND ON ESTRUS!!!)Only after the "success" of the Screamin'Furys did folks decide to get into Rock n' Roll...

Left with being surrounded by dummies,we still managed to carve a little niche for ourselves that helped to pave the way for the really quite great little "community" of bands that exist today.It's EZ to take what's goin' on there now for granted,but without the hard work of The Nearly Deads,The (Real)Pills,the Goddamn Gentlemen,The Silver Kings,Jr.Samples and The Spider Babies,it would still be 1988 in that great little shithole!What's that ,you say? you think some of those bands suck? Well,if only i had a time machine i'd show ya how it was different compared to now!!!

Sorry 'bout the long post,and i'm not yellin' at ya,just giving you a quick history lesson on Stumptown Rock to put it in perspective! :)

So,the next time some emo ass chump that just heard Johnny Thunders last week cops a 'tude,you can tell 'em to go fuck themselves with AUTHORI-TAHH!!!

L.U.G = Lesbian Until Graduation,natch.

Now Reed is full of A.F.L. (Asexuals For Life). Don't get me wrong, I kinda like it here right now and I even liked some of those bands you mentioned (even though they aren't really "my thing"). I don't base my entire existence on what bands are playing when or who came from where...I am pretty sure I did at one time though, so if that is your thing, fantastic, I just burnt out on it.

But I gotta say, this town is full of some full on snobs of all stripes and musical scene affiliations. They scream insecurity with their absolute inability to deal with anyone who doesn't equal a rung higher than them in the Scene Ladder. And too many people have zero senses of humor OR history, meaning they tend to bore the fuck outta me. Now who's the snob, right???

Not to mention the aforementioned level of cocaine abuse...holy christ. People will shove chrystallized battery acid into their noses in this city!

two words-

poison idea.

Ya know it rains a lot in Seattle.

never underestimate the rain and it's soul-killing ways.

HEY!! there's still some good folk in stumptown!! Okay, maybe we're the minority, and maybe I can't even include myself in the fold of good folk, but let me just say there are 3 kick ass shows going on in Portland tonight. and 2 out of 3 contain not only touring bands, but pretty damn good locals too. wherever you go there you are.
fierydrunk, where you gonna be? we gotta have a drink togethuh

Sorry about gettin' all Band Geek on ya,f.d.,just thought 'cuz it's on this board that the snob hassle coulda been musically related! I'm really not as much of a music zombie as it might seem by my post,just thought i'd put in my experiences in that field as a kinda pep talk i'm sure you don't need!

I coulda saved about a zillion words and said that people in the South invented everything,even whatever dumbass faux-high-minded "art" they think they're trying to lord you over with and left it at that! Oh well,i'm sure i woulda had this discussion with ya in Holly's basement bombed outta my skull anyway...

BTW,joe d,i'm wasn't trying to imply that Portland never had good bands,i just thought the "Louie Louie" factoid was interesting and made good "Snap!" material in case some creep wanted to act all big.I wish i coulda seen PxIx open for Turbonegro last week(?)!Even though it's not 1986 anymore,i bet it was fun!

Nothing captures the sound of the soul-killing rain of the NW like the Wipers...not even the Sonics!

See ya at the "Portland House Party" thread!

Hey Joe,

I'm gonna be in Seattle Saturday and Sunday with the Little Killers. Hope you can come out, would love to see ya...spread the word to folks in Seattle too.

Saturday at Sunset; they play 2nd or 3rd

Sunday at Sunset, 4 O'clock Punk Rock Matinee show, they play 2nd.

Hope to catch up

Tom

OK, pullin' an "Alienator" here, but hey, yer all talking to me and I am obligated to respond!

Laurel--I ain't going out tonight but I was thinking we ought to meet up at some point! I am NOT as unfun and grouchy as I read...I am going to that show tomorrow though and likely drinking before and after somewheres, maybe the Chez.

Joe is going to the Chez tonight--what shows are happening?

Both you NWters have fun in my hometown on Halloween. I will hold up the fort on this side of thangs.