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Goner Message Board / Upcoming Shows For Goners Everywhere / Neal Pollack Invasion w/ Unknown Pleasures + Andrew Earles = new jokes Oct 3 Hi-Tone
Andrew Earles
Posted: Sep 27, 2003 9:24 pm
Sit back for a sec....it's a long one.

Friday Night, Oct. 3rd The Hi-Tone Memphis TN
The Neal Pollack Invasion
Andrew Earles: All New Jokes
The Unknown Pleasures: DJ's Eric and Zac
Starts: At a decent time. Door: 7.00

The self-proclaimed World's Greatest Writer, Neal
Pollack, will follow up a reading/signing of his new
book "Never Mind The Pollacks" at David Kidd
Booksellers with a rocking/rolling at The Hi-Tone on
Friday, Oct 3. Neal was one of the early hands in the
formation of the much-exalted McSweeney's literary
empire (as an "old college buddy" of Dave Eggers), and
his first book, "The Neal Pollack Anthology Of
American Literature: The Collected Writings Of Neal
Pollack," was the first book to be published on the
McSweeney's imprint. It is available used, right this
second, for $1.96 on Amazon dot com. It is a very,
very funny book. Then came the small press "Beneath
The Axis Of Evil: One Man's Journey Into The Horrors
Of War" which I haven't read, but I'm sure is funny
solely because Neal Pollack has never been anywhere
near a war. Neal has just stepped into the
high-exposure world of big name publishing with his
latest book, "Nevermind The Pollacks: A Rock and Roll
Novel." This is courtesy of Harper Collins, the same
publishing house that took a recent leap with another
rock and roll book, Ian Christe's excellent "Sound Of
The Beast: The Headbanging History Of Heavy Metal."

What does good writing have to do with good rock and
roll? Rarely anything. But Neal has put together a
rock tour to coincide with his book tour, and that
rock tour features The Neal Pollack Invasion. The new
CD shares its title with the book for total media
saturation. What does it sound like? Like good sloppy
Midwest old-school punk with super nasally vocals and
HIGH-larious lyrics.

You can check Neal out, in all of his glory, right
here: www.nealpollack.com

You can read what Publisher's Weekly, people who have
actually read the book, wrote about "Nevermind The

"In his latest satiric bid for immortality (after The
Neil Pollack Anthology of American Literature: The
Collected Writings of Neal Pollack), humorist Pollack
details the life of a famed rock critic named,
predictably, Neal Pollack, and takes swipes at scores
of legends along the way. Styled as a series of
interviews by rival rock critic Paul St. Pierre,
conducted after Pollack's untimely death, the novel
charts the history of Neal, born Norbert Pollackovitz
in 1941 Memphis, Tenn. Norbert's love for music is
evident early on, and soon he and neighborhood pal
Elvis Presley are making noise in town. When Elvis
accidentally backs over Norbert's father with a truck,
Norbert is on his own and is christened Neal Pollack
by his pals; he soon flees town to discover the world.
St. Pierre's progress in examining the life of the
"grizzled monster" is slow until he visits Bob Dylan
in Woodstock, N.Y. As Dylan tells it, he met Pollack
in 1961, at Woody Guthrie's bedside. The incorrigible
Pollack goes on to steal Joan Baez away from Dylan and
then moves to Liverpool to become a star rock critic.
By the mid-'70s, Pollack returns to Manhattan; Johnny
Rotten, Iggy Pop, David Bowie and, later, Kurt Cobain
make cameos. Saturated with original song lyrics and
pop-up appearances by rock music's greatest legends,
Pollack's novel has a swinging appeal. Not everyone
will want to tune in for the author's manic
tongue-in-cheek self-canonization-his kitchen-sink
approach sometimes makes for garbled reading-but
Spinal Tap fans and groupies everywhere will be

So it appears a much needed slaughtering of the Lester
Bangs/Nick Tosches/Richard Meltzer sacred cow is in

Tired of reading? Too bad. The whole point of this is
to get you to a rock/comedy/DJ show.....specifically
one which will showcase an established writer turned
rocker. We can thank the heavens that this is not the
other way around - an occasional misstep that has
produced horrifying garbage like Dylan's "Spider,"
Richard Hell's "Go Now," Nick Cave's "And The Ass Saw
The Angel," and Bruce Dickinson's "Lord Iffy Boatrace"
series of erotic sword-and-sorcerer books. File under
"body odor" literature indeed!

Here is Neal's artist bio from the Telegraph Company
web site (www.thetelegraphcompany.com) - the label
that so graciously released the "Nevermind The
Pollacks" CD companion....

Who is Neal Pollack? He's not a person, in the
traditional sense. His music, a transcendent
incandescent spirit illuminated by the dark heart of
the American id, overcomes all boundaries of class,
race, and sexual preference. Pollack is the doomed man
on death row rattling his tin cup against the cage in
defiance of unjust law, the bus driver on his coffee
break, the teenage girl vomiting up her lunch in the
cafeteria bathroom. His words, his lyrics, describe
acts that take American life into the realm of legend,
or memory, or both. When he sings, "New York City is a
pile of shit/New York City is a pile of shit/New York
City is a pile of shit/Ahhh, New York City," he
brandishes a gutter joker's stiletto but also a
humorist's warm touch that has its roots in Whitman,
or at least a guy who Whitman used to hang out with.
And when Pollack sings, "Hey yo dildos, juggling
dildos, up in the air, dildos dildos," he channels a
forgotten city of our minds and souls, reclaiming
ordinary life from the ash-heap of lost memory. We are
grateful, also thankful, and we touch ourselves. For
who can deny Pollack's throbbing power every time he
opens his mouth? And who can turn away from his words,
his defiant tone, and his refusal to kowtow to the
clichéd realities of the day? Not me, that's for sure.

This, then, is Never Mind The Pollacks, from The Neal
Pollack Invasion. As an album, it's a miracle. As
music, it's timeless and old as America. As an
artifact, it's certainly artifactual. The story of the
band is almost as profound, and American in its own
way, as the tales Pollack weaves in his songs. Among
Jon Williams' thumping bass lines, Neil Cleary's
eerily defiant rhythmic drumming, Dakota Smith's
protozoan proto-punk guitar wizardry, and the organ
shit that Jim Roll slapped in at the last second to
fill out the songs, lies a saga of men who barely knew
one another yet came together to make an album that
will stand among the 100 greatest albums of all time
according to some magazine somewhere.

As The Neal Pollack Invasion appears before us, we
witness a rock-n-roll miracle, no less miraculous
because it's verifiable. In an age where countless
bands claim the title of garage-rock authenticity,
this album is the genuine article, an actual work of
myth drifting out of the fog of the American popular
imagination. Roll and Cleary and Williams and Smith
have a lot of experience. Roll plays with Chuck
Prophet. Cleary covers Hank Williams, Sr., as well as
anyone, Williams is a warrior, and Smith's parents
owned a Houston honky-tonk. Pollack brings his own
strange energy, part idiot savant punk anger and part
musical theater. The resulting album is an accidental
Basement Tapes for our time.

The recording of Never Mind The Pollacks may only have
taken five hours, but they were hours loaded with a
lifetime of energy and brilliance. This album travels
the fugitive path from prison to escape and then back
to prison. As with most great music, it's a map to
nowhere, but also to treasure. And like so much
treasure, and so much else, it remains unfound.

So, if you finished reading this post in time, COME

Midtown Is Memphis
Posted: Sep 29, 2003 11:22 pm
Asshole In The Breakroom
Posted: Oct 2, 2003 4:15 am
Which one of you broads put the popcorn on 40 minutes?
Posted: Oct 4, 2003 12:02 am
7:00? when's all the shit kicking off for real andy?
asian persuasian
Posted: Oct 4, 2003 12:19 am
andy earl is suuper wrongtime funny
in lo down dirty dog 2. good job andy!
me luv you wwrongtime!
Andrew Earles
Posted: Oct 4, 2003 1:06 am
That's the door cost. I'll probably go on 10:45 - 11:00, so I'd say start playing music around 10:00? I dunno....
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