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Goner Message Board / Upcoming Shows For Goners Everywhere / I lovingly give you tits, asscrack and ballsacks (and Impala, who couldn't bear to look)
Posted: Jun 18, 2006 10:51 pm | Edited by: Windy
WARNING: red, wrinkly, saggy, swinging samballs

I'm not kidding, it's bad.


here ya go:
final solutions
true sons of thunder
Impala, clearly embarrassed
Posted: Jun 18, 2006 11:14 pm
Posted: Jun 19, 2006 7:34 pm
See- they're doin fine without me. Melissa's tits look much better without all that hippie paint on them.
Posted: Jun 19, 2006 10:23 pm
who is this melissa?
someone give her my number...tell her i'm on the rebound so i won't be looking for anything long term...
Posted: Jun 19, 2006 11:25 pm | Edited by: CrucialDude
official transcript

Crucial Dude - Do you prefer tapes or cds?
Dirk Diggler - CDs.
Crucial Dude - Well see deez nuts.
Dirk Diggler - ok tapes then
Crucial Dude - tape deez nuts to the back of your neck
Posted: Jun 20, 2006 3:34 am
See- they're doin fine without me.

You're gone but you ain't out, there's only one way out of this outfit -in a body bag!
Posted: Jun 20, 2006 3:44 am
and I believe SAM knows about bags
JOE hang around you would be NUTS to flop now
Posted: Jun 20, 2006 3:52 am

is that bill paxton?
Posted: Jun 20, 2006 5:49 am
its vincent d'onofrio.that show was his biggest role yet and he dropped the ball.
Posted: Jun 20, 2006 6:19 am
joey, i may not be your sister, and windy, i dont know if you'd disagree, but i would never ever ever ever in a million and a half years let that chick anywhere near your phone number.
Posted: Jun 20, 2006 6:26 am
we have a term for that.

Posted: Jun 20, 2006 6:48 am
let that chick anywhere near

Tried to put two bucks in the tip jar (for the band, the awesome "FINAL SOLUTIONS") and "nipples" snatched it out and put it in her shoe. I grabbed the two bucks back from the shoe, and put it back in the jar. She still tried to nab it back. If she were a stripper, I woulda put the bills between two fingers and made her grab it with her ass. But she weren't on the bill, and that two bucks was supposed to go to the band. No two dolla' fo' "nipples".

I'm all for nipples, but this weren't her show.
Posted: Jun 20, 2006 7:24 am
as far as that girl is concerned, it's always that girls show. i nearly beat her little ass the last time i saw her in murphy's. not to mention, she's fucking 19 years old. i have had run in after run in with that chick and i'm telling you she's a fucking. . . well, see the "c word" thread under ??? .

it's not cockblocking in this situation, joey. trust me, there are better rebound options at the memphis zoo. and it's free on tuesdays! save your 2 bucks!
Posted: Jun 20, 2006 7:36 am
i dunno.
i'm kinda desperate at this point.
Posted: Jun 20, 2006 7:37 am
is there a Goner nudist coloney?
Posted: Jun 20, 2006 8:54 am
Those are the droopiest balls I have ever seen, he might wanna get that checked out...
Posted: Jun 20, 2006 12:47 pm
Those are the droopiest balls I have ever seen

You mean you've seen more than one pair?
Posted: Jun 20, 2006 7:35 pm
She totally sounds like my kinda gal. 19 and naked at the show! Whoo-Hoo! Sign me up!
Posted: Jun 20, 2006 8:21 pm
Hey Joey... she's married.
Posted: Jun 20, 2006 8:45 pm
jackstands, I wondered what you two were tussling over. I saw her fiddling around the tip jar.

Joey, seriously, you don't want any part of that. I been hearing stories...
Posted: Jun 20, 2006 8:49 pm
windy, were you at the buc that nite 2 people were fucking in that car parked RIGHT IN THE FRONT of the bar huh? it's been a little while. . . .
Posted: Jun 20, 2006 9:12 pm
no, but i was there one night after hours when two people were fucking against the sliding glass doors then snuck in the back and were fucking in the bathroom.
Posted: Jun 20, 2006 9:29 pm
She gots the puffies.
Posted: Jun 20, 2006 11:18 pm
hmmm. . .did you get some shots?? hehe
Posted: Jun 20, 2006 11:21 pm
no, that was pre-camera. if i could download from my brain..........
Posted: Jun 21, 2006 12:23 am
I'd fuck those puffies... Dig in !!!!!
Posted: Jun 21, 2006 1:35 am
if only i could delete what i saw from my brain.
Posted: Jun 21, 2006 2:17 am
Hey Joe, define hippie paint cause I think that red shit was just acrylic. And I have doubts if that marriage was legally binding and I heard that they aren't together anymore.
Posted: Jun 21, 2006 2:17 am
We should have had photographers at the naked Barbaras practices....
Posted: Jun 21, 2006 3:48 am
We should have had photographers at the naked Barbaras practices....

No, you should not.
Posted: Jun 21, 2006 12:57 pm
We should have had photographers at the naked Barbaras practices....

Isn't that band a bunch of dudes?
Posted: Jun 21, 2006 1:54 pm
hannah barbarah is a dude. yeah sam there a bunch of nude dudes ???? ?at practice??????nude dudes???????
Posted: Jun 21, 2006 3:23 pm | Edited by: conner sewer
I should have clarified. The practice where Melissa was naked since she gets more attention than the music. Would have made interesting shots because of the strobe light. And isn't it barbera?
Posted: Jun 21, 2006 9:07 pm
well, good for her. that's what's she shooting for anyway, right?
Posted: Jun 23, 2006 11:02 pm
there was an almost all-naked barbaras practice, I think. and when the Vampires practiced in the same garage, a rule was briefly enforced that called for every mistake to be penalised by removal of an article of clothing.

as for melissa, I don't think anyone would be bothered by her if everyone got naked at shows and fucked in public places all the time. I think it is mostly everyone else's fault for not being naked.

as for the final solutions, I have no idea how the show went as I was only able to enjoy the few brief segments that I was conscious for from the table I was sitting at outside, before forgetting the night almost entirely. to anyone who I may have attempted communication with, I offer an apology, with reservations. I'm sure the show was cool, though.
Posted: Jun 24, 2006 1:22 am
to anyone who I may have attempted communication with, I offer an apology

i hate when that happens.
Posted: Jun 24, 2006 4:42 am
I think it is mostly everyone else's fault for not being naked.


...or is it here, here?
Posted: Jun 24, 2006 5:43 am
for god's sake scott, please don't get naked.
Posted: Jun 26, 2006 11:21 pm
If everyone was naked you wouldn't even notice me.
Posted: Jun 27, 2006 12:03 am | Edited by: Tommy Trouble
Healthy young ladies naked: yes
Scott naked: no
Justice naked: fuck no
Posted: Jun 27, 2006 9:33 am
You know, Justice, now that I think about it...I've, unfortunately, seen you naked. I owe ya one. Don't worry we'll settle up next time I see you.
Posted: Jun 27, 2006 9:50 am
that was the freakiest bunch of images i've seen since captain sensible got naked in 1977 on stage in LA. i couldn't bear to photograph it.
windy, you got some.... well, one would normally say "balls" here but i think that term is reserved for sambeaux.... you got some guts!
Posted: Jun 27, 2006 5:48 pm
i don't think guts covers it. i need therapy now.
Posted: Jun 27, 2006 9:14 pm
Nice TiTZ.....mmmmm...I'll take it.
Posted: Jun 28, 2006 12:39 am
Nice TiTZ.....mmmmm...I'll take it.
who's titz are you referring to? justices? scott's? melissa's?
Posted: Jun 28, 2006 7:48 am
Posted: Jun 29, 2006 7:58 pm
Posted: Jun 30, 2006 6:48 pm
Posted: Jun 30, 2006 10:47 pm
According to Zac, Melissa's on the all-time guest list. I concur!!
Posted: Jun 30, 2006 11:23 pm
i'm speechless.
Posted: Jun 30, 2006 11:32 pm
Is that all i have to do to get on bands' all time guest lists....damn why didn't y'all mention this before
Posted: Jul 1, 2006 12:24 am
Britney and Windy, I was just kidding. However, bare breasts are ALWAYS welcome (according to Justice).
Posted: Jul 1, 2006 12:50 am
I'll remember that.
Posted: Jul 2, 2006 4:54 pm
It's true, boobs are always welcome. Without hair on them is prefered, however.
Posted: Jul 2, 2006 5:35 pm
well, considering i've got about 12 years on that chick. . . you probably want to just stick with hers. she's not old enough to have had gravity kick her ass yet.
Posted: Jul 2, 2006 7:39 pm
No comment.
Posted: Jul 3, 2006 12:09 am
the masks scare me more than anything else. . .well, the testicles are pretty scary too. maybe the testicles need to wear a mask.
Posted: Jul 3, 2006 1:58 am
about the tip jar...those who were there may remember a bit of a dance i received on stage. she was digging for the dollar that i threw at her, that someone else put into the tip jar. hell, SHE earned that particular dollar.
Posted: Jul 3, 2006 9:49 am | Edited by: Windy
mask the testicles! i think TSOT should dress up as mexican wrestlers next time. I just watched are particularly great match and one guy was wearing a yellow cat suit with black stripeson it. Sambeuaxxx sshould wear htat one.
Posted: Jul 3, 2006 2:33 pm
a yellow cat suit with black stripeson it

Man, that even reads as slurred. Awesome!
Posted: Jul 3, 2006 4:39 pm
i think TSOT should dress up as mexican wrestlers next time

that mexican wrestler costume thing belongs to los straitjackets
Posted: Jul 3, 2006 4:53 pm
Posted: Jul 4, 2006 6:29 am
I love you incle spatula.
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