Goner Message Board
 | Forums | Register | Reply | Search | Statistics | Manual |
Goner Message Board / Memphis / Remembering Jay
Posted: Jan 13, 2010 11:06 pm
So, my way of grieving is to remember all of the great moments I have had with that person. And Jay has given us all so many memorable moments I thought we could share our stories with each other.

A short list for me because there were many memories and it has been a long week...
Lost Sounds at the Peoples Temple - brilliant beyond words
Jay eats a slug at Rich's house
Jay destroys the fish on the wall at Murphy's and busted up his nose
Alicja turns to me at Horizontal action and says "Jay is about the rip down the disco ball" and as I turn to the stage, Jay jumps for the disco ball and rips it down
Jay plays Quinn's bass with a drum stick shoved in his ass
Zacs face when Jay threw a beer at Goner Fest x2
Jay pissing in the pepper at the HI-tone and making people smell it- fortunately he let me in on the secret and did not make me smell it
He had a great laugh, smile, and sense of humor. He will be missed.
Posted: Jan 13, 2010 11:11 pm | Edited by: littlemisslinda
writing his name on the fence in urine at Carol O's B-day party.

most of the guys laughed as as the females revolted in disgust.

Girls are sissies.
Posted: Jan 13, 2010 11:17 pm
It seems Jay enjoied public urination immensely.
I wish they would said something on the news about that.
Posted: Jan 13, 2010 11:18 pm
He also had a the most polite demeanor of anyone in this town, contrary to popular belief. The images that are sticking with me right now are his knowing nods of greeting without being obnoxious, upon my return to Memphis. I appreciated this so much, Jay. RIP, goofball.
Posted: Jan 13, 2010 11:56 pm
Anybody remember the Reatards Halloween show at the old Map Room when he bit the head off a dead pigeon? That was pretty classic. If anybody's got some photos of that out there, I'd be willing to barter for cash/sexual favors/etc.
Posted: Jan 14, 2010 12:15 am
i don't have too many stories, but there's a few that stick out:
seeing a show at the map room and jay happened to be ther and we ended up heckling some bad electro dude, then fucking with the guys friends.

being 1 of 4 people not in a band at a different map room show and seeing jay (typically) wrapped in cords, laying on his back with his head halfway out the door and scaring the shit out of some downtown stiff coming in for a drink.

my fav memory though was when i came back in town for a xas break and seeing him at that barbaras/strange boys xmas show at the bucc and we just kind sat around and chatted and hung out most of the show. he didn't have to, but he did.

saispas is right, he was always polite, especially to a nobody like me. people can say whatever they want, but all i can go on was how he treated me, and i'll always respect him for that.
Posted: Jan 14, 2010 2:09 am
Devastating news, my thoughts go out to his family and friends...

I'll never forget The Reatards performance (specifically Jay's) at the South End opening for the Compulsive Gamblers... Jay was drunk as a skunk and pissed off about something or other, running along the tables around the edge of the room kicking over beer bottles and generally being an asshole, I guess he was only 17 or 18 at that point... I fucking loved that show, it blew my tiny mind and stays with me to this day... He's made some awesome records...

RIP, young fella... You'll be missed...

Joe Presedo, London Goner Chapter
Posted: Jan 14, 2010 3:24 am
damn it ......
Posted: Jan 14, 2010 5:10 am
... had a few serious talks with the man. Way too young. What can you say?
Posted: Jan 14, 2010 5:22 am
and no, I did not encourage him to wee on the stage. period.
Posted: Jan 14, 2010 8:46 am | Edited by: RMike53
I bought Jay (along with Stephen and Billie) dinner in Fort Wayne, IN before his show there in 2008. Very quiet, polite, and considerate. I'm sure he could be a jerk at times, but I like my heros that way. RIP. He will be missed. Glad I made the trip to Gonerfest 6 to see that unforgettable performance as well.
Posted: Jan 14, 2010 9:52 am
I don't have many one on one encounters either, but I still laugh my ass off thinking about this one:

Bunch of folks over at Eric's house for a cook out or somesuch. Jay's standing around the table in the kitchen talking about playing a joke on the others by stuffing jalapeno's full of green hot sauce. I got the peppers hollowed out, he poured the hot sauce, but somehow the joke never quite played out. He ate them himself and just about shit his pants because they were so hot. I swear it was like watching a cartoon the way his face got red from the bottom up.

He was always polite to me and I appreciated that, being the Memphis legend that he was(among so many others) would even talk to me, some girl who was a johnny-come-lately to the scene.

Last time I saw him was in Detroit. I had only seen him in passing a few times since I moved, but he welcomed Mark and I backstage, seeming happy to see a few familiar faces. RIP.

I know that's nothing compared to so many other of the long-time Memphis goners, but he'll be missed all the same.
Posted: Jan 14, 2010 10:28 am
Should be a huge show on Saturday May 1st, 2010....Jay's 30th birthday....call it Jay Day instead of May Day...rock the fuck out somewhere...just a thought.
Posted: Jan 14, 2010 11:06 am
"Belgian memorable moments" :

Jay playing guitar, suffering from high fever and still screaming his lungs out on the floor of the 4ad club (first euro tour w/ the persuaders) - he seemed so young (almost vulnerable even if i hate to use the word)

Jay and Alicja throwing stuff at each other on stage in the pit's club on first Lost Sounds tour - amazing set

Jay running over an old timer car that was parked the other side of the street after setting the pit's on fire (after solo tour)

A thrue musical genius, R.I.P.
Posted: Jan 14, 2010 11:17 am
I think it was '97... Jay was down here visiting in Mississippi, we (The Eunuchs) had become friends with Jay because he called us after he heard a demo tape we sent Eric at Goner. My friends in the band Not Dead Only Frozen had booked a show for some terrible SoCal punk band at their practice/party space that was also an auto shop in the country in Crystal Springs. So we went to the show and Jay got loaded and stripped naked and poured a quart of motor oil all over himself and then grabbed a can of oven cleaner and sprayed it on his balls. Not a smart move, but hilarious.

That's just one of a bunch of well, reatarded stories. Lighting farts while recording the Eunuchs album, our chaotic "final" show with Jay on drums in Normal, Il., Jay getting his dick drawn by the photo booth at the Memphis mall, the list goes on.

Last time I saw Jay was at Murphy's in Memphis. He was strangely kind of morose. He was in the midst of signing with Matador and asked me what I thought about it. I said if he could get paid well to make his music that's exactly what he deserves.

It's a goddamn shame he didn't get to enjoy that for longer.

RIP, ya foochie.
Posted: Jan 14, 2010 11:26 am
By the way, Lutenizer—do I know you or do we both have a "Jay eats a slug at Rich's house" story? Because he did just that at a BBQ at Rich's apartment in Jackson. My memory's fuzzy but I think it was '98. Jay speared a slug and roasted it over the open flame of the grill and chowed down. Said it wasn't bad.
Posted: Jan 14, 2010 11:33 am
Great stuff Carey. I didn't know him as well as some, but I always loved playing shows with his bands especially the Final Solutions. I remember when he was part of the group that coined the "halfstache" that I had when the Solutions played in Jackson. I can also say I honestly that I really enjoy most of his records and I too think he very much deserved the recognition,etc. of Matador. A lot of people only think of his crazy moments and not the fact he was a workaholic when it came to music and very good at it. RIP
Posted: Jan 14, 2010 11:54 am
I didn't know him well, but ran into him several times while in Memphis. He was always very nice to me, would shoot the shit over a few beers, etc. My sincere condolences to his family and close friends.
Posted: Jan 14, 2010 12:00 pm
Thought people would like to see photos from Jay at Gonerfest 4, Andria Lisle introduced us and we made some quick photos after the show, plus I like the live ones too.

Sorry to hear about the loss to the goner community.

http://www.photoshelter.com/c/blickenstaff/gallery/Jay-Reatard-Gonerfe st-9-27-07-Portrait-Live/G0000dtmTmSNC__w
Posted: Jan 14, 2010 2:33 pm
i only knew him in passing, so my deepest regrets go out to his friends and family. he was on quite a roll there musically, and i was pretty excited to see where it would lead him. RIP, dude.
Posted: Jan 14, 2010 2:43 pm
An article about Jay just made the top of the Enertainment section of the msn.com website:

Posted: Jan 14, 2010 3:30 pm
and no, I did not encourage him to wee on the stage. period.

yes you did....and it was hilarious! there was some terrible band that jumped on a gig that gito gito hustler was playing and you talked jay into peeing on the girl....man, she was pissed! it was pretty funny
Posted: Jan 14, 2010 4:28 pm
Jay at Gonerfest 4
thanks for posting those
Posted: Jan 14, 2010 6:30 pm
Here is our Jay story tonight.
Posted: Jan 14, 2010 6:46 pm
CS Eunuch - we may know each other, I am Mary - Hemant's wife. I don't get out too much any more or post too often due to med school (bummer). But this was in Memphis at the Rembert St. house. He did not roast it. I am sure cooking it would have been better. I can't even remember how long ago that was. I think it was after a LS show?

Grumpy- don't get me wrong, I did not post this as a crazy moments post. I just needed an outlet to express my grief and for me it is to remember the good times (almost all of which were at Jays shows ((or after)) because I rarely missed one and was never disappointed- I was a big fan). Jay was a perfectionist no doubt and made music on a level that puts most others to shame.
Posted: Jan 14, 2010 7:41 pm
Long Beach, CA 1999 I threw a big goblet of beer on his bare behind after he pulled down his pants and stuck a bottle up his ass. Afterwards him, me and the Wongs sat around in the empty bar drinking and smoking cigarettes. Good stuff. So long Jay.
Posted: Jan 14, 2010 8:32 pm
I was pointing you out Luteinizer. I was actually refering to a lot of the people who met him once or twice and just thought he was insane and didn't recognize his talent.
You guys obviously had some good times. I was getting rather annoyed looking at people making stupid statements on some other non Goner blogs.
Posted: Jan 14, 2010 9:52 pm | Edited by: queenothetwist
Every time I crossed paths with the guy it was memorable. We had our online email scuffles about lots of stupid shit and at the first Gonerfest I was sure we'd get into it - instead, when Jay saw us, he apologized for getting his "panties in a wad" and handed us a huge pile of records for free. I always felt he acted like one of those kids who wanted to piss people off before they could decide to dislike him. But then he'd back down and decide to befriend you. Maybe lowering our standards was his way of feeling like he could let us like him.

anyway, my favorite: SWSX 200? Jay teabagging brooks while he was passed out on Wes Coleman's floor; him, chris stephen and whoever else was there in the dark, giggling like little girls inside their sleeping bags and then decided to forcefeed me a gas station burrito (not a euphemism). Everything is truly funnier when you're sleep deprived.
Posted: Jan 14, 2010 11:44 pm
So sad. Too soon, Jay Reatard! Some thoughts of Jay....We actually met at his first show or one of his very first shows, he was 14 or 15 I guess around 1995 or 96 we played together at Shawn Cripps place on Marshall upstairs kinda across the alley from the Peeps Temple. He played guitar and Greg O played drums. Good punk stuff, but the only song I remember was a good reworking of the Beatles "I'm Down". And, of course, his energy. Later we shared many stages together, and yes, I saw him drink the Heinecken from his Converse Allstar at the Map Room and also piss on his snare drum and drink it at the Last Place on Earth...my friend has pictures...or is it Urban Legend...anyway Buddhist monks drink their own piss all the time, no biggee. Always a great entertainer. We had a band together around 2000-2001, the CC Riders, along with Alijca and James Arthur. We had a weekly practice Fri evening 7-9pm. It was fun even if we didn't have a gig that week. Jay always added the right guitar parts and hooks even on the real rootsy stuff we were doing. Very talented and a quick study. And to me, always very polite. I bought a hearse during that band (my 2nd actually, in the tradition of Sam the Sham, Neil Young, and the Mummies) with hopes of CC Riders touring. Unfortunately, we only got as far as Two Sticks in Oxford. On the trip back to Memphis, Jay wanted to ride in the back with the equipment and sleep. After about 3 miles he was banging on the glass divider window wanting me to pull over and let him up front. I don't know if it was too cold back there or too haunted...Fortunately, about this same time Lost Sounds started to take off and get known. And tour. A couple years ago I saw him at the post office and he was about to leave on his 7th or 8th trip to Europe and he wasn't really into it having done it so many times, but at the same time he knew it was a good gig. Recently when the big labels were interested and making offers we had a beer together at the Bucc and talked about it. He seemed to be in a really good frame of mind. Oddly enough, he signed with the same man who signed me 23 years earlier...small world. I last saw him at Gonerfest hanging out at Murphy's parking lot, he was feeling 'his oats' as they say in horse racing, having a good time and he told me for his next LP he wanted to do a 70's hippie country record with the pedal steel and all that. He had been listening to Vernon Wray's LP and strangely enough I had too, so we sang "When Ah Stawp Dreenk'n, Ah'll Stawp Theenk'n Nuv Yew....." RIP Jay Reatard--One of The GREATS! I'll miss ya.
Posted: Jan 14, 2010 11:51 pm
Wow. Thank you jeff. Thank you everybody. Goddamn what a crazy couple of days. We miss you Jay Reatard.

We are putting together photos for Jay's funeral. If you have good ones, please email them to jayreatardphotos@gmail.com

300-500k is best... going to be projected so teeny ones won't work.

Thanks in advance. Please help if you can.
Posted: Jan 15, 2010 8:23 am
Eric told me he had gotten a demo tape from a kid in town, he was intrigued and he wanted me to hear it. Curious, I asked what he thought. I remember he said "I think he's the new Greg Oblivian". I wasn't sure what he meant. I just kinda' laughed cause I thought that was a funny thing to say. Then I heard Jay's tape and eventually met him. I got what Eric was talking about because Jay was obviously influenced by my songs and the Oblivians in general, but when I met him it really struck me that he was the mirror of myself at 15. Head wrapped up in music, angry, on his way to dropping out of school and no future on the horizon except his belief in himself and his abilities as a songwriter. It was erie and inspiring to me at the same time. I wanted to help him anyway I could. I started helping him with demos in his bedroom and we started making plans to play some shows. Him on guitar and vocals and me on drums. His excitement was contagious. With a giant laugh and wild look in his eye, he was excited. To him, the wheels were starting to turn and his dreams were coming true. It was only a short matter of time before he would be ready to make a record. From then on, look out world. He ran away from home once and asked if he could stay at my house. I said sure, I'll come get you, where you at? About two days later his mom called me and asked if he was there. I said yes and that I was looking after him. She said she appreciated it but if I didn't bring him home she was gonna call the police on me. It never occured to me that hanging out with someone so young could get me in a lot of trouble. I told Jay I had to take him home. He was really hurt. He wanted to live at my house. I wouldn't have minded but I started to wonder if I was doing the right thing. I was trying to do right by him but what if I was a bad influence? the next time I talked to Jay he asked about practicing. I told him that I thought he should find some kids his age to start a band with. He was hurt and in retrospect, likely felt like I was abandoning him. Maybe I did. But what I did, I did out of love. I didn't like myself much at the time and couldn't risk imprinting him with this state of mind. Anyway, this was the beginning of cold relations between me and Jay. And others. Life roared on. Jay found others to play with. Other, better, role models. His eventual colaborations with Alicia were pivotal, I believe, in Jay's musical growth. She was into all kinds of pop music that was a foreign world to him. But Jay was a musical sponge and he absorbed and incorporated it. Amazing really. Over the last few years Jay and I have become friends again and our meetings have been very healing to both of us I think. To everyone here, never leave things hanging with the people you love. I look back and think of the time I wasted being in a stalemate with Jay. Wasted. I could not be prouder even of my own children as I am of Jay's accomplishments as a true artist. I wish I could tell him right now. I wish I could hug him and kiss him but I can't.
Posted: Jan 15, 2010 10:09 am | Edited by: Whiskey Bent
Greg - Jeff.....thanks for sharing these stories. So rad.
And also to everyone else.

I have photos to share now -- but really want to scan and share the old ones -- especially the ones from them being at my house -- Jay in the backyard making a smiley face with his belly & belly button, holding one foot while trying to jump through it with the other leg.....black and white photots of Lost Sounds wearing ALL leather at beerland -- it was SOO fucking hot -- lost sounds first show in Austin - Jay had (what I called) a side mullet -- at this weird place called 'bandland' (which was retail shop) downtown blocks from the Capital.

I'd do anything to be there tomorrow :-(
Much love to you all.
Posted: Jan 15, 2010 10:34 am
Hi Mary, maybe we met when I used to live in Oxford from 00-02, but my memory of that time's hazy at best and a complete blackout at worst. Say hello to Hemant for me, he probably knows me better as Carey.

That's hilarious that there are in fact two different "Jay eats a slug at Rich's house" stories. Only Jay would do something like that to get a rise out of folks not once but twice.

Wish I could make it to the funeral tomorrow. My condolences to all those I know in Memphis that were close to Jay.

Perhaps there will be some sort of memorial or something in the near future for fans/friends?
Posted: Jan 15, 2010 11:00 am
listening to his music helps the heartache..play it LOUD!!
Posted: Jan 15, 2010 11:05 am
I wrote this for Live From Memphis yesterday.
Posted: Jan 15, 2010 1:28 pm | Edited by: Whiskey Bent
really nice chris.

my 20 yr old roommate who became a jay fan since he's lived with me (9 months) asked me if I knew about 'jay pissing on a crowd' recently....i was like...no...but....ummmm...yeah....I'm sure. He and all most kids finding about his music 'were' there to see the freak show...(I know that's old news i.e. black lips, et al -- I got no real problems with that).....but most of 'them' were the ones trying to provoke jay so they could 'be THE kid that provoked jay' in internet news....just like the little fucking dumbasses did while he played here a month ago.

the printed version of the clip below (titled 'Punk Rocker Found Dead' in the paper) also said this (didn't know printed versions were different):

'Reatard played Emo's last month, a show that ended with the arrest of two audience members who attacked Reatard on stage shortly after he said he was playing his final song of the night.'

Jay Reatard found dead in Memphis home

96% of these photos are fucking random 'A-List' assholes who likely dont even know a band is actually playing....but a there's a couple of jay from the show.

all this rambling could be avoided if I had $1,000 to spend on a flight so I could be with you all and get all these feelings of melancholy out and over.
Posted: Jan 15, 2010 1:41 pm
I met Jay the first time when we were on our first tour with my band at the time the Blacks. I remember we were going to Eric's place and Jay was sitting in his couch. We were young and didn't say much to each other. He played with a band called the Ultracats. Then I remember interviewing him for Savage Magazine when he was at Louie's house recording the Persuaders. After that I met him every time he came through Stockholm. When he came last year he told me about his Matador deal and said "They're giving me so much money dude! I've bought a house and brand new sneakers." I told him I was happy that people like him and the Black Lips were able to make some moey and he said "I'm so much smarter than the Black Lips". I really enjoyed hie more "mature" progression. He'll be missed. My thoughts go out to everyone at the funeral tomorrow.
Posted: Jan 15, 2010 4:00 pm
I first met Jay when he was about 17, just came back from Europe and had been stabed and showed me his scar...I met him off and on and he always was nice...even so people told me that if you booked him he was an a..he was the exact oposit..he helped me with the sound, asked me if it had worked out alright for me, thanked me just recently ( years later!) again for the good treat and good food. and on the night of the show went to blast loads of hard cash euros on a near by fair with the chinks on rollercoaster and bumper cars. and race around karlsruhe with a electronic mini bike they gotten in italy..one of the craziest & best shows we ever had!!
Posted: Jan 15, 2010 5:00 pm
don't really know what to share with you all right now. too many crazy things me and jay have been through. he lived with me for a while when he was 16 and in just a few months did enough crazy and fun shit to fill up a whole fucking book. But none of those memories are feeling very good right now. Not much really is.
Posted: Jan 15, 2010 5:01 pm
I promise to write a bunch of the best and funniest stories as soon as i can.
Posted: Jan 15, 2010 8:37 pm
I've got some stupid stories but don't feel like contributing to the Jay=GG Allin scene right now, both sweet ass dudes with gnarly stage personas that would come back to haunt them possibly. This shit's for the birds...hate it!
Posted: Jan 15, 2010 11:26 pm
Ive seen Jay do crazy shit, but I always mostly remember him being really nice and humble whenever id see him and tell him i enjoyed his music or a show. He was always cool to me and i wasn't someone he had to be nice to. I think its a fucking shame to lose anyone at that age, and compound that by his talent and its tragic. Death is an ugly business, and it took a nice, talented guy who's passion for music and music added to our lives. RIP Jay.
Posted: Jan 16, 2010 12:56 am
Great thread. As a shy guy who just sat home and listened to the music, it's great to read all these stories about Jay. You guys are all incredibly fortunate to have been part of his life. He was incredibly lucky to have such good friends.
Posted: Jan 16, 2010 7:06 am
i never met jay, but from reading this thread he sounds like he packed more into his 29 years than some people do in their entire lives. his example makes me all the more determined to take advantage of every opportunity i get to do what i love. thanks jay.
Posted: Jan 16, 2010 4:15 pm | Edited by: littlemisslinda
I first saw Jay in a grocery store where I stocked the dairy section all day. I looked to my right and there's a guy with a laughing mongoloid on his t-shirt, and above it is printed "RETARDS". I couldn't stop laughing all day, especially once I started drinking........

maybe an hour later, worked 3 more hours.
good times.

This shit's for the birds...hate it!

If you say this stuff while he's still alive, you come off as appearingly gay honey,and NO ONE WANTS THAT!!!!
Posted: Jan 16, 2010 5:46 pm
Couldn't bring myself to attend the funeral so just some words...
It's no secret that I've never been a big fan of Jay's music. However, I must admit I've always admired his ability to promote independent thought without worry of the repercussions. For better or worse, he was definitely true to what he believed. I respect that. Based on the history of Memphis music, the news of his passing could only be compared to that of Otis Redding. Someone so young and full of energy who just got his first taste of worldwide success. Also like Otis, he inspired and motivated those around him and left so much in so little time. In a way, the city has seemed to stand still the past few days. It is time to mourn now but I hope this unleashes a wave of productivity and motivation on the rest of us. Jay was anything but lazy and we could all learn from that. Life is short... too short sometimes. Don't waste it. My condolences to his family and close friends.
Posted: Jan 16, 2010 5:51 pm | Edited by: Buck Wilders
Also, I can't believe I missed the chance to tease him for this photo...
http://c2.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images02/84/l_18f7799065a24165a4afb 57ae36d1c09.jpg
Posted: Jan 16, 2010 6:28 pm
I hope this unleashes a wave of productivity and motivation on the rest of us.the steady stream of text above us would prove that it's already way under way. I read somewhere in the jumble of press bouncing around the ether right now that when people die it releases all that energy and it gets all around you. I feel it. it's weird. It feels electric. and it's major. My thoughts are with his family and friends and his music is never leaving my player. Long Live Jay
Posted: Jan 16, 2010 11:01 pm
I met Jay thru Zac when we were in college. It was obvious he was really gifted. Zac and I went and picked him up from his mom's house a couple of times and you could tell he was dying to get out and get started. I remember seeing him play at Barristers with Greg O on drums and being annoyed at how good was. I think he was 16-17 at the time. He had a gold les paul copy. He recorded our band the Jackmonkeys on his four track in a fraternity house at Rhodes and it turned out surprisingly well. He used to give me shit for having long hair which I think is pretty funny now.

Years later I returned to Memphis with a band to play at Young Ave. That night they had double booked and told us we couldn't play. Jay said he'd never play there again unless they put us on. Kowing how much weight he pulled, they gave in. I don't think Jay even liked my band, but as Zac put it, "he's just that loyal." He even stood outside and took money for us.

Despite all his shenanigans and negative press was a good person with a big heart. No one can deny how great he was at music.
RIP Jay.
Posted: Jan 16, 2010 11:32 pm

If you say this stuff while he's still alive, you come off as appearingly gay honey,and NO ONE WANTS THAT!!!!

well luckily he's dead Dead DEAD!!!!!!

and one of my stories (not the daytime kind) would most obviously make it appear I was gay

hope half of Memphis is on fire tonight and there's fucking in the streets
Posted: Jan 17, 2010 1:27 am
Mu-ther-fuk. I hate this shit.
RIP Jay, tell 'em I said to fuck off.
Hell, you were nice to me. Fuck 'em.
Posted: Jan 17, 2010 9:03 am
I never met or hung out with Jay, but I do know a bunch of you Memphis folk. My heart goes out to all of you who were close to Jay. Hang tough. Jay seems to have been an unstoppable fireball of action from the git go, and his passing is gonna leave a real big hole. Dude was the real thing, and that's worth remembering. Here's the bar. Here's how it's done. Dilletantes take note.

Posted: Jan 17, 2010 1:43 pm
This thread is really touching and heartbreaking. My condolances to all of you who lost a friend. RIP.
Posted: Jan 17, 2010 8:25 pm
Jay Reatard was born out of the same socio-economic experience of Southern poverty, which creates artists like Elvis Presley, Lil Wayne, Ike Turner, Junior Kimbrough… the list goes on of brilliant yet troubled musicians from the South.

For Jay, music was an escape from the streets of Memphis and a dead end life. He did not have a safety net or other options to fall back on if music did not work out. He gave his music everything and more. The tragedy of him passing at 29 is that right when he was getting to where he had been struggling to get to- he is gone.

I had known Jay since he was 15. There was always something extraordinarily engaging and powerful about him. Jay was funny, smart, sensitive, brilliant. His persona and antics often got more attention than how great his songs were, and how talented of a musician and performer he was.

Those of us who were a little older than Jay and had first met him when he was a 15 year old kid who floored us with his homemade demos, recorded with plastic buckets for drums, were always pulling for him, proud of him and always wanted the best for him. He was like a younger brother to many of us; no matter how much he screwed up sometimes- we still loved him.

After my band Impala broke up in the mid 1990s, I briefly played with Jay in the Reatards before he found a permanent line-up. I loved playing with him but I honestly could not keep up - he played faster than I could! I always tried to keep up with what Jay was doing after that but it was hard to; he always had so many new projects. When Blood Visions was released, you could tell something had changed with Jay. It seemed like it was the release he had been building up to his whole lifeâ€"he wasn’t hiding behind a band anymore, the stakes were higher, he was maturing, and if he was going to make it, it was now or never.

When he signed to Matador and began to work on Watch Me Fall, the stakes were anted up again. Jay felt that he finally had the eyes and ears of the world on him and he had to deliver to not let his fans down, both new and old. When Jay got in touch with me about working on this record, I was surprised he would relinquish his sound in someone else’s hands, and extremely honored and excited. When he came in to record, he effortlessly nailed everything in one take like I have only seen the great Memphis session players from Stax and Hi Records do. It was magical to see him work in the recording studio - it is the one place where sometimes time seems to stand still. No distractions, no fans yelling and throwing beer bottles, no show to put on- just the music.

What I keep thinking about now are the last conversations we had about the studio he was going to build in his new house, the next record he was going to make, the records he was going to make and release on other artists- the future.
Unfortunately, we will not get to hear that now and how he would progress â€" and Jay would have in a brilliant way that would have pushed the boundaries and everyone’s expectations.

Scott Bomar
Posted: Jan 17, 2010 10:52 pm
Posted: Jan 17, 2010 11:57 pm
What I keep thinking about now are the last conversations we had about the studio he was going to build in his new house, the next record he was going to make, the records he was going to make and release on other artists- the future.

The three times I interviewed Jay he spoke clearly and passionately about his future. He had a lot of vivid ideas and plans for himself and the other bands he was working with on his own Shattered Records. I wish I could have seen more of those ideas happen.

I remember being proud that I was the first 'reporter' (for lack of better term) that Jay told about his deal with Matador. And even when the New York Times and other, way better, magazines and papers were covering his music, he'd still talk with me for my crappy blog. I did my best to tell the crazy story of Jay while he was here ... I planned on covering his music and projects until he retired. It really sucks that happened already.
Posted: Jan 18, 2010 1:43 am
Sadly, I don't have many one on one experiences with Jay. He was a hero to me. I've tried engaging in conversation with him on a handful of occasions but I've never been too good at that. I'm happy I was able to open up for him in Madison when he started his solo stuff i and feel horrible about this news. His music really meant a lot to me and this hits me hard. I've always been excited to hear about a new release and watch him play. A truly amazing musical genius. His legacy will live on! RIP JAY!
Posted: Jan 18, 2010 10:22 am
Is the video of the service going to be available for people to view? Posted on youtube or something. Don't know if it would be too personal to make available publicly. I know at least one person who was unable to attend.

I thought everybodies speeches were great, even Jeffrey Novak's disjointed rambling.

What a terrible terrible thing.
Posted: Jan 18, 2010 10:30 am
Is the video of the service going to be available for people to view?

was afraid to ask, but I've wondered that too. Millionaire and I wanted to come. Couldn't quite swing the trip and felt so strange about doing so that we didn't just jump in the car when we would have had to leave to make it on time. Now I regret that we didn't just show up anyway, appropriate or not.
Posted: Jan 18, 2010 10:38 am
Is the video of the service going to be available for people to view
man, i don't know if i could handle watching that. but i probably would. just reading the eulogy broke me up.
Posted: Jan 18, 2010 10:57 am
just reading the eulogy broke me up.

Posted: Jan 18, 2010 11:49 am
just reading the eulogy broke me up.

Me too. Nice job, Eric, I can't imagine how difficult it must have been.
Posted: Jan 18, 2010 12:09 pm
Ironically, Eric's delivery made it one of the lightest of the evening. It was touching yet tempered with humor. There were a lot of laugh-out-loud moments, probably cause everybody was looking for a little relief. Of the handful of times I'd hung out with Jay, I experienced him as more down-to-earth and friendly than any of the stories that people tell about him. He had a strong personality (and not meant in a negative sense) and it was nice to hear Jay stories that weren't the usual "did you hear what Jay Reatard did" -I could've listened to people tell those kind of stories about Jay all night. That's what we need to hear and remember.

I lost it when his mom started talking, not because of anything she said but just thinking about what it must feel like to bury one of your kids. Jay was like a son to some of the people there. I didn't mind crying myself but I hated watching my friends cry.

Still can't believe this has happened.
Posted: Jan 18, 2010 12:31 pm
I first got to hang out with Jay in 2005 when I got stranded in Atlanta due to a delayed flight home from Memphis. I was stuck at the airport with nowhere to stay, and eventually got hold of Alix's number after a friend posted on here asking for help. I turned up at a Beat Beat Beat bikini kiddie-pool party pretty late on, just missing a bunch of skinheads kicking off. The party was kinda boring, and the booze had run out, so we headed back to Jay and Alix's place. Jay and I stayed up for a while talking shit about music and the Goner Board and Memphis, and he told a lot of fun stories from all the years he'd been playing. We had breakfast the next day, and hung out talking shit until my flight was due.

I don't have any crazy stories from then, or the other handful of times we hung out. My lasting memories will be how much he made me laugh and how friendly he always was. It was great to hang out in London when he started to get more recognition for his solo stuff. A highlight would have to be a warehouse party when we spent most of the night laughing at the hipsters (with a Bob Geldof daughter in attendance, no less!).

My trips over to the US have usually been based around the Gonerfests and Chicago Blackouts, and Jay was always a huge part of that. I'm still finding it hard to believe he's gone. This is all pretty overwhelming, and it's hard not to break up every time I read something. I wish I was in Memphis.

My thoughts are with his family and friends.
Posted: Jan 18, 2010 12:37 pm
what it must feel like to bury one of your kids

That's a terrifying thought for any parent. So sad.
Posted: Jan 18, 2010 2:41 pm
Wish the flyer could have got a less grainy photo.
I'm with Windy sambeaux et al. Wonder if there's a way to circulate a video without it ended up on celebritymorgue.com I would have liked to gone to the service but Memphis isn't in Nebraska.
Posted: Jan 18, 2010 3:48 pm
even Jeffrey Novak's disjointed rambling.

That made me feel uncomfortable.
Posted: Jan 18, 2010 4:52 pm
Stephen really was perfect to me; it was told so warmly and his self-deprecating humor really was comforting. It was really weird though because though it made me smile and laugh a lot, ultimately I began to cry pretty hard then because my grandfather who died about 2 years ago exactly was the same type who talked all the time and told a million stories over and over again. I always wanted to hear them every time because there was something blown up about the next time that made it better and funnier.
Posted: Jan 18, 2010 5:55 pm
I'm so shocked and saddened by Jay's passing. I hadn't spoken to Jay in a while, but I have known him since he was 17 and was so proud to see his success. I never stopped being a fan of his music just because I wasn't talking to him.
I'll miss you Jay...and the fact that I never got the chance to punch you during a show, like I know that you always wanted me to...
Posted: Jan 18, 2010 7:50 pm
Talented cat, sad. Thanks, Monsieur for the comments.
Posted: Jan 18, 2010 9:33 pm
I remember this one time when Jay took on the Makers by himself at Young avenue deli. Between every single song the loudest voice in the room was Jay's screaming "you fucking suck!!" or something of the like. Afterwards there was a huge showdown on the sidewalk and I thought Jay was going to get his ass beat down. Me and rich managed to get him in the car and drive away, but that didn't stop him from throwing a whiskey bottle at the band as we drove away! ---Jay always had the last word-- miss you buddy
Posted: Jan 18, 2010 9:50 pm
I remember the Final Solutions playing to a slightly more than sparse crowd at the Hi-Tone. Brian Glaze played next, and Jay started booing towards the end. He didn't hate Brian Glaze, he just wanted the Gris Gris to go on. Then they did. And Jay could barely contain himself from jumping on stage with them. He maintained, but at the front of the stage, he looked like a guy who was getting ready to do some kind of 100 meter swimming sprint.
Posted: Jan 19, 2010 1:47 pm
I remember this one time when Jay took on the Makers by himself at Young avenue deli. Between every single song the loudest voice in the room was Jay's screaming "you fucking suck!!" or something of the like. Afterwards there was a huge showdown on the sidewalk and I thought Jay was going to get his ass beat down. Me and rich managed to get him in the car and drive away, but that didn't stop him from throwing a whiskey bottle at the band as we drove away! ---Jay always had the last word-- miss you buddy

This story made me laugh and I remember him calling me the next day telling me about that show. We both laughed about "the artist formerly known as Mike Maker" and that he was looking more and more like a younger Question Mark from Question Mark and The Mysterians.
Posted: Jan 19, 2010 2:45 pm
Terrible news. Condolences to his family and friends.

Didn't know the man, but after about a decade on this board I felt like I did. Finally got to see him play in spring 2008 at the Hi-Tone, w/ Cheap Time I think. No peeing or fights, just 25 minutes of balls-out rock & roll. I was impressed. He packed a lot of living into 29 years. I couldn't wait to see what he was going to do next.

He sure livened up this board, too. RIP peepstemple.
Posted: Jan 20, 2010 12:00 am
Wow. For the 1st time in days I can really think good / positive thoughts about him. I think about him almost every day, since I have a photo of him from stinky's peepshow on my fridge since 1999.

These are just what I thought about when he first came out to the west coast. He had just turned 19 I think.

We had this huge box of demo tapes that folks mailed into the label and he wanted to create a cover band called "DEMO" that was him covering the worst songs from the tapes.

The Gibson House fight in Seattle when everyone stood inside the club and watch the fight from the huge windows. And how he had to stand in the kitchen before they played, since he wasn't old enough to get in.

Or how Dave Crider from Estrus called me up and screamed at me for trying to sneak him into the 3-B the next night. This lead to him having a massive temper tantrum on stage. And all these shows fucking ripped.
Posted: Jan 20, 2010 9:21 pm
Why did he choose the stage name Jay Reatard? Reatard? Does it sound like retard as in retarded? What is the origin of the name?

How did he die? Will anyone know? People at 29 without a disease just don't fall over and die.
Posted: Jan 20, 2010 10:41 pm
Why did he choose the stage name Jay Reatard? Reatard? Does it sound like retard as in retarded? What is the origin of the name?

How did he die? Will anyone know? People at 29 without a disease just don't fall over and die.

What the fuck?
Posted: Jan 20, 2010 11:05 pm | Edited by: Rich Balls
simmer down.
Posted: Jan 20, 2010 11:11 pm
simmer down.

Don't worry, that dude is retarded.
Posted: Jan 20, 2010 11:35 pm
OK folks. Over the next few weeks, you will see many postings like the one above on this board and others. Gracing them with any kind of response will only give them what they want. I suggest we all continue trying to help each other grieve. I've enjoyed reading people's remembrances and I would like to take this opportunity to tell you all how wonderful the service in Memphis really was. Being able to grieve with his friends and family brought some perspective to his amazing life. My heart goes out to those of you who couldn't be there. People aren't made to absorb this kind of shock on their own. Don't be afraid to reach out to others. I don't know but, I kind of feel like we were all blessed by being there and I would be glad to talk to anyone who is trying to tackle this alone.
Posted: Jan 21, 2010 12:22 am
Yeah, we should ignore em. And maybe the moderator can delete/ban them?

In the meantime, I've been listening to tons of Jay.
Alotta this!
Posted: Jan 21, 2010 12:41 am
I remember circa 2001 at The People's Temple. It was the end of a show and there were a bunch of people down in the alley loading gear and getting ready to go. People there included The Royal Pendletons, Cool Jerks, Preacher's Kids, Deathray etc... All of a sudeen it just starts raining hot dogs, I'm talking franks just pelted at people's faces. We all look up and Jay has got this econo bag of hot dogs and is just hurling fist fulls of dogs at us with this great mischievous grin and laugh. You were up there with him CS Eunuch! So, we all started firing them right back at him. It was full on war. And full on fun.

By the way, I used to love to come see The CC Riders. That's the band that made me realize what a killer guitar player Jay was.

Jay was always cool to me. He always held my attention.
Posted: Jan 21, 2010 1:57 am
I kind of feel like we were all blessed by being there and I would be glad to talk to anyone who is trying to tackle this alone.

agreed. i don't know what i would have done with myself if i hadn't been able to get to memphis. even though i wasn't in jay's life for years the way most of you were, he meant the world to me and i had some of the most supremely hilarious and amazing times of my life thus far in his company. i'm trying so hard not to take offense to things people are saying about him, and also about me and my methods of grieving. but i've never been through anything like this before, and i seriously don't know what to do with myself. luckily hunx and the gang were all pals with jay, so i have the band to turn to..and dwyer and others...but man. the bay has never been so bleak. it's been literally pouring rain and HAILING here.
Posted: Jan 21, 2010 6:39 am
The first time I ever saw the Reatars was at Barristers opening up for the Neckbones and 68 Comeback. I was living in Oxford, MS at the time. I went up to Jay after the Retards finished (I had heard nothing about them at the time) and introduced myself. I told him how good I thought it was, and that I booked shows in Oxford. Then I asked I'd they would like to come play down there sometime. He looked at me and said, "Well, my mom doesn't let me get out of the house very often.". Then he turned around and walked away with out saying another word or waiting for any kind of response from me. That pretty much set the stage for what kind of relationship we would have from then on out. Me really wanting to like him, and him really wanting me to shut up.
Posted: Jan 21, 2010 7:57 am
I am not going to let anyone take the goner board from me, I am just not.
Any forum has issues like this that come up from time to time, but If I think of something that I want / need to express I will.
Posted: Jan 21, 2010 11:34 am
So, I realized the other day that I've been on this board for about five years, subsequently, that's about the same amount of time I've really known Jay. Both things are relatively short comapred to a lot of other people on here.
There's been ups and downs each year like everyone else, but I have to tell you how fortunate I feel for having been a part of this and having known Jay. Saturday night was an absolute catharsis for me. And Louie's impromptu speech said everything I've ever wanted to say.
I remember a while back I was talking to Jack O about the Oblivians and admitting that if I ever saw them in the 90's, it was by complete accident because I was either at a show to see someone else or hanging around a bar trying to get gigs for my hippy-dippy jam band at the time. This was the case with the Reatards as well; in fact, I got a call from a former band mate Friday asking about Jay. He said, "man, didn't we see that guy at the Map Room or that loft place downtown, or something?" I told him I had no idea, as I just don't remember or we flat-out just weren't there and he was thinking of someone else. So, if I ever saw the Reatards or Oblivians during their prime, it was by accident and I have no memory of it.
But during their "prime" isn't really true (for me), either. I have no idea if it had been discussed between them earlier, but the impromptu Oblivians set Saturday was one of the most emotional music events I have ever witnessed. It seemed as if they played because there was no other choice. And then, there is tons of Jay's live stuff I've been listening to over the years. Angry Angles, Reatards, Final Solutions, sitting in on some configuration of the Barbaras, a couple of Sector Zero shows. I even remember that brief period he was playing with Evil Army, because the Staags were practicing at the Armory, and they would be getting started just as we were leaving. I can't really count how many times I've seen and listened back to Jay performing live, and that's actually how I came to know his music so well. It's funny because by the time Blood Visions and his later records came out, when I heard them I thought "Well, that's a neat take on that one".
No, in this period where he was going in whatever direction musically that he felt like (for me, anyway) has been his prime. Absolutely free to do whatever he wanted, however he wanted and with his own sense of humor. And that's part of the reason this is so sad. I remember there was a controversy during the Matador singles thing. Not only the ever-more-limited availability of the progressing releases, but specifically the third release. The spindle hole was slightly too large, and you had to stand directly over the turn-table to get it to play correctly. There were actually rumors flying around the internet that Jay did it on purpose. And maybe he did or didn't. But it sounds like something Jay would do for a few laughs at record fetishists expense.
And those records. I've seen several mentions about his output, but think of all the bands that he helped, promoted, recorded, released whatever. That Oblivians Barristers show would not have come out last year if it had not been for Jay; he was the only one we knew that had a working half-inch machine. We were going to rent it from him, but he just let us borrow it for as long as we needed. Another thng about records, Jay has made more than a few other people more than dollar bills on e-bay selling records even he didn't have copies of.
And there's hanging out with him at shows or seeing him around town, bullshitting about bands and recording gear and techniques. E-mails and phone calls and jokes. There's so much more I want to say about him, but I'll keep that for myself and talk about that when we're all together in person as we remember him in the years to come, I guess.
I didn't know him as long or as well as some folks on this board, man, am I glad for the time that I had with him in my life.
Still proud of you, man.
Posted: Jan 21, 2010 1:32 pm
I've been reading this for a week now (thanks for starting it, Lutenizer!) and finally feel like I'm ready to post.

In 1993 or '94 I was working at either Memphis Comics or Shangri-la (my memory is fuzzy) when I got a call one day from some high-pitched kid asking to speak to the records manager. The kid said they noticed we didn't have Wolf Rock in stock, and they wanted to know how many copies we'd like to buy. I said something like, uh, just bring in a box, and afterwards I immediately called Eric to tell him that someone had stolen a cache of Guitar Wolf product from him! Eric laughed and said something to the effect of "oh, that's my street team," although I don't think street team was in the lexicon yet.

Later that day, a kid showed up with a bunch of Goner's debut release. It was the first time I met Jay Reatard.

It's so funny to juxtapose my early memories of Jay -- his mama bringing him by to pick up copies of Maximum R&R, or calling because her son had once again run away and was hanging out with us older folk in Midtown -- with the incredibly talented man he ultimately became.

Sometime in the mid-'90s, I started a fanzine called Mississippi Goddamn. I never printed any more than one copy of one issue(collectible!!!) but I never forgot the fan letter Jay sent me along with an ad for publication. It included a painstakingly typed interview with himself, which I will transcribe here, with spelling mistakes intact. It's amazing how he always remained true to these initial beliefs:

Hey, look! It's the Reatards

The Reatards are an ass kickin two peice from Memphis TN. The members include the mentally challenged Jay Reatard (vocals guitar) and Manwich ? (who is using an alias to protect his identity (he's a big rock n roll star in another memphis punk rock ? band.)) Only Jay their fearless leader was able to make it for an interview. Manwich was on tour with his other band.

I've always said that I thought you were a live act that needed to be seen.

Jay Reatard - Thanks man.

What's you're goal when you're playing live?

Jay - Just to act as reatarded as possible and to piss off people with dog collars and mohawks.

What do you hate most about playing shows if anything?

Jay - Groupies - No I really like playing for people as long as they're into it and if they're not who cares.

What's your favorite beverage?

Jay - That's a stupid question but it's Pink Lemonade Snapple.

How do you feel about the sudden popularity of punk rock?

Jay - I don't really give a shit! Punk rock seemed really cool to me at first but after a while it seemed really unrealistic I mean don't get me wrong I believe in some of the so-called punk ethics but come on grow up the punk rock dream world will never happen next question please.

How do you feel about major record labels?

Jay - Hate em.

Why did you start the Reatards?

Jay - I had nothing better to do with my time and if I didn't have an outlet I would probably be insane by now.

Why did you name the band the Reatards?

Jay - I didn't name the band.

Who did?

Jay - The audience at our first performance.


Jay - We played one show under the name the River City Rollers and did blues versions of Bay City Rollers songs, after our first song some guy with a big green mohawk yelled out "you guys are fucking reatarded" so at the next garage party we played I announced us as the Reatards kinda as a joke but the name fit so we kept it, kicked out Martin and Kevin and put Jason on guitar and started writing punk rock songs.

So you guys started off as a Bay City Rollers cover band?

Jay - Well, yeah but Manwich wasn't on drums then some guy named Joe played drums and his friend Kevin played bass and this geek from my music class named Martin played the accordian. You should have seen us. We kicked ass.

I bet. What records are on your turntable?

Jay - They'res 7 of them on there cause I'm too lazy to take one off when I'm through with it.

What are they?

Jay - Oblivians Soul Food LP, the Mummies Play Their Own Records, The Bay City Rollers S/T LP. Oblivians Strong Come On 7", Thee Mighty Caesars new single, and Sacremento's one and only Lil Bunnies first 7" on Moo La La Records.

Any last words?

Jay - Yes. Treat the mentally challenged people just like you would anyone else cause we are people too and just cause you're reatarded doesn't mean you can't rock.

The Reatards Get Real Stupid 7" EP
Punk-N-Roll from Memphis TN
Songs about ramen nodlles, Chuck Taylors, getting laughed at and soul which this record has a lot of.
Write to Jay R. 3788 Dunn Ave, Memphis TN 38111
Posted: Jan 21, 2010 2:14 pm
Holy fuck that's great.
Posted: Jan 21, 2010 2:34 pm
That rules!
Posted: Jan 21, 2010 2:35 pm | Edited by: Crystal Lake
Just to act as reatarded as possible and to piss off people with dog collars and mohawks.

I had nothing better to do with my time and if I didn't have an outlet I would probably be insane by now.

I mean don't get me wrong I believe in some of the so-called punk ethics but come on grow up the punk rock dream world will never happen next question please.

Ha! Any of these quotes could've been taken from an interview (or messageboard post) published last month, last year or anytime, really. Thanks so much for posting this, Andria.
Posted: Jan 21, 2010 2:39 pm
oh my goddddd thank you for posting this!
Posted: Jan 21, 2010 2:42 pm
Andria that is fucking incredible!!!
Posted: Jan 21, 2010 2:43 pm
i know! it makes my heart sing.

what i really love is he was interviewing himself -- what great repartee -- "next question please" -- ha!
Posted: Jan 21, 2010 2:50 pm
next question please.

oh god holy shit hilarious
Posted: Jan 21, 2010 3:51 pm
A funny story Jay's mom told me on Saturday when I told her I had met her at the house on Dunn.
She said I meant to tell this story when I spoke but forgot to-
"When we lived there I was worried Jay's music might bother the neighbors so I went and asked them. On one side of us was a 91 year old lady who said "I dont go out anymore and I love hearing live music" and on the other side was a Vietnamese man who said "I love his music- that boy is JAMMING !"
Posted: Jan 21, 2010 4:24 pm
I miss his freestylez.

After he came to one of my shows at Murphy's last year, he decided to rent out one of the huge top floor suites at the Artisan so everyone could party (even though his house was 4 blocks away.) I talked him into sitting on the window ledge with me, he was like "GIRL you cray cray like jay jay!" We left the artisan (and everyone in the room he'd rented)at like 6 am, went for a walk around memphis, ended up at Beauty Bar around 10 am or so? Our table was full of mimosas and bloody mary's that we were barely even drinking, and all the sudden Jay decides it would be hilarious to prank call the Artisan. He calls 'em up, and uses that weird scared little ghetto girl voice he loved to talk in. Tells the hotel clerk that the people in the room (basically tirefire and co.) had beaten him up and stolen his credit card, and demanded that they be kicked out of the room and pay for it too! He was all "They hit me like a woman! They hurt me! This is Jimmy Lindsey and I ain't in that room! I can't go back there I'm so scared!"

we (scott, i know you remember this) were all sitting there practically gagging ourselves because we were laughing so hard and didn't want to give it away. When Jay finally got off the phone, he looked at me and said "Dude, Muscle is gonna kill me!"

and then we ordered some more drinks. never a dull moment man...hahahaha.
Posted: Jan 21, 2010 4:29 pm
i wrote sort of a goodbye to him on my blog, if anyone wants to read it. it's hard to think of the right words to say, but it's from the heart.
Posted: Jan 21, 2010 4:29 pm
"When we lived there I was worried Jay's music might bother the neighbors so I went and asked them. On one side of us was a 91 year old lady who said "I dont go out anymore and I love hearing live music" and on the other side was a Vietnamese man who said "I love his music- that boy is JAMMING !"

That's HELLarious
Posted: Jan 21, 2010 4:31 pm
Andria, thanks for that.
Posted: Jan 21, 2010 5:29 pm
This is all so great.
Although I didn't know Jay, (except for some weird words on the Goner board about the ghetto Kroger, and a nodding acquaintance just lately), and didn't hear a lot of him (don't get out too much) I've really been hurting for all of you, and for the large loss.
Sappy, but there's a "family" here-one that's been a real comfort to me in the last few years. Seems like everyone has lost their incorrigible little brother.

You all mean a lot to me, and I'm so, so sorry for your loss.
Posted: Jan 21, 2010 10:39 pm
I only met Jay a couple of times so I barely knew him, but it pains me to see so many of my friends back home grieving right now. I lost a good friend who was working in Haiti on that same Tuesday, so in some way I empathize with y'all. Whatever happy, healthy energy I have had left in me has been constantly directed home to Memphis since that day. RIP, Jay.
Posted: Jan 22, 2010 9:57 am
What do you hate most about playing shows if anything?

Andria, this is probably the best question for a band interview of all time. Please make sure you ask it in tribute sometime!
Posted: Jan 22, 2010 10:30 am
We all look up and Jay has got this econo bag of hot dogs and is just hurling fist fulls of dogs at us with this great mischievous grin and laugh. You were up there with him CS Eunuch!

Ha! I completely forgot about that until now! I remember we went upstairs cause Jay had a bottle of booze he was hiding from everyone else, and he showed me this huge box of nasty, grade-D lips-n-assholes hot dogs that I forget why he had them or how he came by them. Anyway, I think I suggested jokingly we throw them at y'all and of course that's all it took for Jay to wage an all-out war!
Posted: Jan 22, 2010 10:53 am
I am slowly digging into boxes in my basement. Just found an old phone book (yes, there was a time before cell phones and you had to write a person's number down...) and in it I had 8 different phone numbers for him. Numbers are scratched out, one is from when he lived with his mom. One says work, but then I have another that says Y.D. with another number. I can't even remember him having another job, but he must have at some point.

I am wondering today how much the Young Ave. Deli spent in long distance calls in the time that he worked there? Must have been a bundle, since he would call me on every single shift.

Anyone that knew him when he was younger would agree that he could have an existential moment about almost anything.
He might call to talk about the fact that one person had said that The Reatards sounded like Halo of Flies. That one thing could be a 2 hour phone conversation.
"Do you like Halo of Flies?"
"Um, they are alright"
"you don't think we sound anything like a band from Minneapolis?"
"well, no. I don't"
"Eric says they are an AmRep band. We don't sound like an AmRep band"
Posted: Jan 22, 2010 11:28 am
thanks, jay for trying to make me feel better when i wrecked my mom's car by telling me you wrecked your mom's car too.

btw, i still blame you. ;)
Posted: Jan 22, 2010 12:34 pm
Found it! Thank you, Internet Archive!

From the Tyler Keith & Preacher's Kids / Royal Pendletons / Cool Jerks (with Walter Daniels) show at the People's Temple... Zac & Amy's post wedding show!

Jay Reatard, Goner Hot Dog Hitler

More from that show...

2003. So long ago.
Posted: Jan 22, 2010 5:03 pm
Hahahaha!!!! That's so good!!!
Posted: Jan 22, 2010 7:43 pm
That was one of the greatest nights ever! I don't think I've ever been that drunk again...while playing music...in public. Who the fuck am I kidding.
Posted: Jan 22, 2010 7:45 pm
The captions under all those photos add a certain high school annual feel to the nostolgia.
Posted: Jan 23, 2010 7:58 am

my copy of a friend's copy shot off the tube. Sorry, had no other way. Look for RoboJay around the 230 mark.
Posted: Jan 23, 2010 3:55 pm
That's right! Greg and Esther's wedding was that same night too. The Pendletons had played that wedding and I think the PK's had played Zac and Amy's. I guess Deathray wasn't on The Peeps Temple Show. But, I remember Nick being there. Scott was wasted!
Posted: Jan 23, 2010 4:17 pm
Hilarious video, and worst haircut ever.
Posted: Jan 23, 2010 8:36 pm
pretty cool article someone wrote about jay in the san francisco bay guardian that came out a couple days ago...
Posted: Jan 24, 2010 4:56 pm
best/worst thread ever.
Posted: Jan 25, 2010 12:24 am
ha ha, wow, I think the interview Andria posted just about says it all. It's funny for me reading a lotta these recaps cause I remember the way I cringed during a lot of these events and my stomach dropped, for example Jy pissing on the fence at Jeannine's party (Carol's b'day party) behind Shangri-La and then him yelling at Jared or Scott Taylor about being an indie rock faggot. Man, it's all so funny to me now but I still feel that weird turning in my stomach feeling re-hearing the stories. For me I have other stories, especially stories from before I knew him very well and we were just friends and Jay did nothing but be hillarious all the time. Jay wearing these red leather pants of mine for two weeks in the summer. Jay had these jeans that smelled so bad that if when he sat on my couch the couch smelled really badly afterwards. I had hinted at them being dirty but it took Viki Lassiter to tell him finally he smelled like peepee and ass. I think that's when I gave him the red pants. Jay was always putting on funny clothes and cutting ridiculous hair styles. as many times as he made me frown he made me laugh five times as much. If anyone feels weird because they partied hard with Jay, well don't, you were truly enjoying him. That was a part of who he was, I sometimes hated that partying part Jay and I wish I had just accepted it more since there was nothing I could do about it. I loved one of the first Lost Sounds outta town show at the Big Horse in Chicago with the Guilty Pleasures. We were so wasted on a giant bottle of whiskey that Steven (also R.I.P.) had walked out of the liquor store with. Jay ended up getting naked, it was a Puerto Rican holiday an lotsa cowboys playing pool and Jay suddenly did a naked belly flop on the pool table. We laughed so hard later as he was describing those dude's faces. I was so drunk I fell off stage that night an busted my lip. Later there was a party at the Horizontal Action guys' house. I think that night like 25 or more people slept at that house, we went to sleep after the sun had been up for a while and I remember we had become almost sober by then. The lady who ran the Big Horse, who was about 15 years older then any of us, and had come out to the party and found a drunk passed out guy on the floor to get off with, right next to the hideaway bed jay and I had scored. She got up to leave and Jay and I were I think the only people still conscious enough to hear her say "ya'll were a lotta fun". And she walked out the door and the night was over. We had lotsa nights like this. When Jay let go suddenly everyone started to let go too! That is the power he had that everyone felt so affected by. But there were nights the world was a bigger force then Jay. We saw the Roman Coliseum by night, at 4 am, no tourists, just stray dogs howling and protecting the historical grounds. We got chased by angry drivers in Paris who we had grazed in our van. We slept on a freezing and very loud beach in So-Cal when no one would give us a place to stay. Rich the next day pooped in the ocean on a very busy public beach in LA. Jay stood on my keyboard and bled at a Map Room show almost no one even saw, like the one where I shamefully smashed my guitar. Michelle, owner of the Map Room loved Jay, she always laughed at his antics and welcomed his shows. I remember the Halloween pigeon and the head Jay spit out actually landed in Gladney's cleavage, she was dressed as a cigarette girl. I mean it was like a dumb movie. Jay had a lotta big hair. Once Jay bought some black hair dye that was on sale. He went in the bathroom to use it an came out screaming that his hair had melted. It sure had, we tried over an over to wash the waxyness out and get down to his hair again but he resigned himself finally to cutting off his hair. He was freaking out for like 30 minutes yelling "My hair, MY SIGNIATURE HAIR!" I always teased him about that phrase in the future. But after I saw the box in the trash can I was like, Jay, this dye is for black people hair and he was like I didn't know, and he pointed to the part of the box that said "pour hommes" in french and said that he thought it was for POOR HOMIES. Totally ridiculous. Not only did Jay come from a rough place but as a very young child he had experienced more stability and a better life and then watched it all fall apart while still very young. It takes beingolder to see how a person like Jay might choose to live his life after processing such instability. I truly believe a person like him could not happen again in a million years.
Posted: Jan 25, 2010 4:40 pm
The "My hair, MY SIGNIATURE HAIR!" is probably one of the best stories you have ever told me (and that is saying a lot) It still makes me chuckle.
Posted: Jan 25, 2010 4:42 pm
he pointed to the part of the box that said "pour hommes" in french and said that he thought it was for POOR HOMIES

This just made my day
Posted: Jan 25, 2010 4:53 pm
I cringed during a lot of these events and my stomach dropped, for example Jy pissing on the fence at Jeannine's party (Carol's b'day party)

I was repremanded by a drunk gardner for laughing at that later on that night.
Posted: Jan 25, 2010 8:06 pm
Posted: Jan 25, 2010 10:39 pm
Jay karaoke?
Posted: Jan 25, 2010 11:37 pm | Edited by: BlackJack
OK, one sorta brief one...

I was lucky enough to present Jay's music in Kalamazoo on 7 different occasions (with 9 bands total! some double bills). The first time that Lost Sounds played (still one of my favorite shows EVER) was with Miss Alex White and the Catholic Boys opening at Kraftbrau. There was a big crazy party after wards that went on for a while until the hosts got tired.
Anyway, Jay + Lost Sounds crew, Billiams, some of the Catholic Boys and probably others that I am forgetting ended up crashing at my place.
Jay, Billiams and I hung out in the kitchen drinking for several more hours until I finally had to crash out.

When I woke up in the morning, I surveyed the scene and noticed that EVERY SINGLE LIQUOR BOTTLE ON MY BAR WERE COMPLETELY EMPTY.
And there several that weren't even open when I went to bed. Including a full bottle of Scotch. When Jay woke up I said to him, "Wow, you two (Jay and Billiams) drank up ALL of my liquor."

To which Jay smiled and replied, "Yeah man, we did some damage."

Afterwards, we went to breakfast and I threw up while waiting for my food.

Thanks for the music, Jay.
You were always cool to me and I thank you for giving our shitty little town so many chances to watch you in action.

Some K-Zoo ANGRY ANGLES footage:
(after a short animated intro)
Posted: Jan 27, 2010 6:44 pm | Edited by: Aron
I remember driving in from Oklahoma to visit Zac while he was in school and Jay was couching it there at the time. Zac and Justice had class so Jay setup a 4track and pulled out a 5 gallon bucket, a tambourine and his guitar. He was laying down a surf style guitar track and I was to play the drums. After my inability to keep a beat became apparent I was pulled off bucket duty and demoted to shaking the tambourine and screaming something ridiculous into the mic. He told me I could scream anything I want, and for some reason I think I ended up screaming "Ay Pinche!" Ridiculous. Later in the day we drove around Memphis and I took pictures of him and his guitar in weird places, like on a flatbed truck, just him and his guitar. When I came back a couple of weeks later I asked him if I could hear that song, but he had recorded over it. I'm still looking for those pictures. I miss him.
Posted: Jan 28, 2010 8:06 pm
I remember the Halloween pigeon and the head Jay spit out actually landed in Gladney's cleavage, she was dressed as a cigarette girl.

I had totally forgotten about Jay biting the head off a pigeon. sick and amazing.

that was a great show, and a great night. Alicja, I remember you throwing the light off a traffic sawhorse into the crowd and it hit me on the foot and I was drunk and totally pissed and wanted to fight you but I thought you were terrifying and I knew you'd kick my ass.
Posted: Jan 29, 2010 1:27 pm
Posted: Jan 30, 2010 10:41 am | Edited by: ida slapter
The Spin article is nice, genuine. I can't listen to a fucking thing of Jay's at this point, not sure when that will be o.k.

For some reason this song is making me feel better...

http://northeastbeast.blogspot.com/2009/06/johnny-thunder-im-alive.htm l
Posted: Jan 30, 2010 11:43 am
Earles, that was brilliant.

Thank you.
Posted: Jan 30, 2010 12:05 pm
"Williamsburg, Portland, Austin—they don't need help. Memphis needs help."

Well said, Andy. I wish I had the patience to come back one day.
Posted: Jan 31, 2010 11:27 pm
Thanks for the compliments. Means a lot, really, and I can't state that enough...
Posted: Feb 1, 2010 7:51 am
Thanks for the compliments

It's the best thing I've read about such a shitty deal...
Posted: Feb 1, 2010 10:27 am

I write a column for Razorcake and I'm working on a section in memory of Jay. I'm trying to contact Andria and thought I'd post here to see if she sees it. Or, if anyone else knows her and can pass along my info, that would be great! I'm at: madeleine[AT]baran[AT]gmail[DOT]com.


Posted: Feb 2, 2010 12:14 am
hey everyone who emailed me, I'm in touch with maddy already. thanks!
Posted: Feb 24, 2010 11:53 am
I'm sad this has fallen to the second page, so I'm bumping it up.
Posted: Feb 26, 2010 10:10 am
I wrote a little thing for Razorcake about Jay.
Stuff from Alicja, Greg O, and Scott Bomar
http://www.razorcake.org/site/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=2 2240
Posted: Feb 26, 2010 11:57 am
good stuff, rich.
Posted: Feb 28, 2010 9:33 pm
thanks, Eric!
Posted: May 12, 2010 11:03 pm
LIVE stuff
Download it!

Angry Angles 5-26-06 - Empty Bottle

Angry Angles - Belgium 11-19-05

VPRO Radio show - Amsterdam - 5-16-07

Austin - Halloween 2007

Australia 3-7-08

NYC 10-10-07

6-16-07 - Paris

Toronto (10-05-07)
Your Reply Click this icon to move up to the quoted message

Only registered users are allowed to post here. Please, enter your username/password details upon posting a message, or register first.

  Goner Message Board Powered by PHP Forum Software miniBB ®